The Shiny Snitch
by Andrew Joshua Talon
Summary: Harry Potter in the 26th century... And the crew of Serenity's along for the ride. Drabble challenge, multiple crossovers. Back in business.
1. Chapter 1

_Well, there haven't been any Harry Potter/Firefly fusions, so I might as well be the first to write one. And it's a challenge to boot. _

"_Botched"_

The man in the long, brown coat lowered the still-smoking gun, eyes blazing. This house on Union, one of the Core worlds, was a stately suburban dwelling owned by a local factory manager, who lived here with his wife and son. The browncoat, his robbery on the same factory having gone south, had had the rest of his gang split and hide until the angry buzzing of the Feds died down. He'd run through yards and climbed over fences, almost cornered by a few police cruisers, before stumbling into this particular domicile.

Here, a little boy, no more than eight, had hidden him in a little cupboard under the stairs, no questions asked. His large green eyes behind tattered, taped-up glasses had shown an understanding of the browncoat's plight, something that made the thief a bit cautious. But the child's fearful looking about, a rabbit among wolves, had given the man the impression that he and the boy weren't so different. They were both out of place in the plush, luxurious surroundings.

He hadn't come here looking to be a hero, of any kind. The job was supposed to be simple. But the moment the factory manager, with his boney wife and piggish son, arrived from the factory banquet they'd shot to hell, things stopped being simple for the man. The manager struck the boy across the face, for being out of his cupboard. For not hiding from the police. For _talking_ to anyone. The screams and curses went on for exactly six seconds, before the man's fist met the manager's face, sending him crashing into the kitchen table. And to silence the screams of the horse-faced wife and chubby child, her shot a round into the ceiling.

"Now then… Mind telling me why you've got a young'in for a punch bag?" The question was cool and collected, but the rage burning in the man's eyes made clear the man's stance on the matter. The manager, wiping blood from his mouth, snarled back.

"You dare to break into my house, threaten my family, and strike me! I'll pull out every stop I can find to see you hanged!"

"Way I see it, yours is the neck ain't gonna stay whole much longer," the browncoat growled back. The manager laughed mockingly.

"Over _him?_ As far as the law is concerned, he doesn't exist. He's mine, to do with as I please! And I don't even want him! He's a useless, conceited, ungrateful freak without an ounce of respect or worth!" It was the sad, believing expression on the boy's face that broke the browncoat into action once more, seizing the manager by his collar and shoving him against the wall, his pistol at the manager's sweaty forehead.

"Shame for you that I think different, _dong ma?_" The manager's purple faced exploded into blood as the man's pistol handle smashed his nose. Letting the overweight manager slump to the floor, over the screams of his family, the browncoat turned to the boy, staring in a mixture of confusion, shock, and a hint of repressed, anxious hope. The man grimaced, considering just how much more things were to go contrary to the plan, before gesturing with his head towards the door.

"Well… C'mon," he said simply, turning and walking out. He checked back a moment later, and saw, to his relief, that the boy was following closely, his expression one of disbelief, before, upon noticing the man's gaze, looked down at the ground again.

The browncoat kept the little one walking quickly, as they left the screaming house and cookie-cutter neighborhood far behind. They traveled in silence, coming to the outskirts of the city, where a landing pad with a large, rocking-horse shaped vessel sat patiently. The man, finally having enough of the boy's silence, stopped. The boy copied instantly.

"Hey… Don't you, you know… Talk?" Of course, he'd heard the boy talking before, but he felt the need to break this silence with a slight tinge of humor. The boy, still looking down at the ground, murmured," Yes, but they don't like me to."

"Who? Those _Tyen-sah duh UH-muo?_ Listen; if you're coming with me, on my boat, you're gonna have to talk, got it? As much as you want or I can stand. Ain't got no use for mute folk."

"Yes sir," the boy nodded in understanding, still not looking up. The man sighed, before kneeling and angling the boy's chin up to meet him, face to face.

"Secondly, you've gotta look me in the eyes. Means I can see you." At the boy's confused look the man coughed.

"I mean, I can see you anyways, but not, you know… _You._ Er, I mean… Hey, what's your name? Speaking of you, and all."

"Harry. Harry James Potter," the boy murmured meekly, but (to the man's relief) with more conviction than before. The browncoat nodded.

"Good name. Mine's Malcom. Captain Malcom Reynolds. And that there? That's _Serenity…"_

"_Puzzle"_

Jayne Cobb frowned in annoyance, at the pieces of Vera scattered all over the kitchen table. The architect of the mess sat with the rifle's empty magazine and firing chamber assembly, fiddling with both to try and put them back together, green eyes focused.

"Gorramit, boy! You ain't got no sense! Breaking down Vera without no sense, that's what it is," he snapped. The boy, looking up fearfully, put down the pieces with a tremble.

"S-Sorry, Mr. Cobb, sir. I was just… Just trying to help," he murmured, head bent in shame. The merecenary's expression hardened at the memory of the reasons for the boy's reaction, before sighing and pulling up a chair.

"Just so's we don't have this problem no more, seems I'm gonna have to teach you the proper way to put these back together. Think you can handle it?" The boy looked back up, wearing that annoying expression of hopeful disbelief that made Jayne want to go back to Union and introduce those gorram Dursleys to Vera. He then smiled, a smle that Jayne had to admit he was getting used to.

"Yes sir. Thank you, Mr. Cobb, sir!"

"First things first—don't call me 'Mr. Cobb'. That's my dad, _dong ma?_ Now then… Start with the butt and the things that won't go bang, first…"

"_Toys"_

"Rawr! Fear the might of my awesome roar!" Bellowed a Tyrannosaurus Rex.

"Never! You will fall before the strength of justice!" Returned a Triceratops, before it charged and struck the larger predator with it's horns.

"Argh! Mine is a dying cry! Argh… Ack… Guhhh…"

"Harry? Husband?" The pilot and the orphan looked up from the control panel, to the bemused expression on Zoe's face as she looked into the cockpit from the hatch door. Wash coughed slightly, pushing his toy dinosaurs out of sight.

"Er, just giving Harry here the lay of the land, dear," he smiled in slight embarrassment. Harry, his grin a guileless one, held up a brontosaurus proudly.

"This Land!"

"_Mirror"_

"I dunno, Harry. I think it's cute," Kaylee's reflection smiled next to Harry's in Inara's mirror, as the little boy glumly held up his bangs to expose the jagged scar on his brow.

"I don't know why it's even there," the boy sighed. "The Dursleys… They never told me about it. Or my parents. They never told me… Anything…" The mechanic, frowning in sympathy, held the little boy closer. He tensed, as he still did, even after a year on _Serenity_ with Kaylee's hugs, Jayne's pats on the back, and Wash's playful shoves. Physical contact had meant nothing but pain to him in the past, and even in his new family, he was always expecting a painful blow to fall. But finally, he relaxed into Kaylee's warm embrace, sighing gently, as she stroked the scar comfortingly.

"It's allright. None of us… We ain't going nowhere…"

"_Education"_

"Three times three is…"

"Nine."

"Good. Four times four?"

"Sixteen."

"Five times five?"

"Twenty-five."

"Harry!" The little boy jumped in shock, as Inara looked up from the cue cards with an annoyed expression on her face. The captain was standing in the Companion's shuttle, arms crossed, as he glared.

"Didn't I tell you not to come in here?" Mal asked in his "sergeant" voice. The orphan nodded solemnly.

"Mal-!" Inara began, but Harry went in first.

"I'm sorry, Mal! Inara was teaching me math, and I wanted to learn more. I only got to addition in school," he explained, looking plaintive. Mal raised an eyebrow. The boy had never asked for anything, really—He'd insisted on cooking and cleaning to pay his way, no matter what anyone else said. But here, he was finally wanting something for his own.

"Can I please continue? Please?" Inara frowned at the captain.

"I'm not going to be teaching him anything for you to find offense at, Captain. And I'm not going to charge tuition." An amused eyebrow rose on her face. "Unless you want to pay me to teach him?"

"No thank you. Harry? Just go right on learning anything you want. Aside from what might provoke me into shooting Inara."

"What would that be?" Harry asked, curious and innocent. Inara smiled slightly, shaking her head.

"I think we'll save that discussion for when you're older…"

_More to come, but first, the challenge details:_

_The mission is to write several little drabbles, no less than 100 words, no more than 1,000, with little snapshots of what Harry's life would have been like were he raised by the crew of _Serenity. _In this universe, the characters and circumstances are exactly the same as in the HP books—just set in the Alliance System of the 25th century. The magic world is still hidden and was moved from Earth along with the Muggles. The wizards and goblins hid a few moons and planets in the system magically where they could live in peace, one such moon being the home of Hogwarts and Hogsmeade. Apparation, Floo, and Portkey travel is between planets, but no more dangerous than it was in the 20th century on Earth. Plenty of magical creatures were brought along and were settled onto new worlds as well. Quidditch is still the biggest sport there is. They do occasionally take ships, but generally prefer non-vehicular transportation. Name, location, and people alterations are entirely up to the writer._

_With these things in mind, I challenge any Firefly or Harry Potter author to write a few drabbles (as many or few as you like) about how Harry and the other characters, including _Serenity's _crew, might proceed in such a world. This is my starting drabble set. You can write from any point in time of the two series; continue from where my drabbles start, or come up with your own beginning. Pairings (or lack thereof) are up to the author's discretion, though I do ask a few things if you decide to include romance: No River/Jayne, Harry/Ginny, Ron/Hermione, Harry/Snape, Harry/Voldemort, or Harry/Draco. Any other slash or het pairings are allowed. Good luck!_

_Edited 4/15/06: _Due to very reasonable critiques that Mal got _Serenity_ four years ago (which would make Harry seven or eight at the time), I have changed Harry's age when he joins _Serenity_ accordingly.


	2. Chapter 2

* * *

"_Patience"_

"I don't get it. It just don't add up." Zoe nodded as her captain continued his musings, as she bound his most recent gunshot wound.

"The deal's about to go south… Patience is raising the gun… And Harry just, pops in there behind them!"

"Pop, sir?"

"Pop. Like a gorram balloon. Or maybe a firecracker. _Anyway_, one pop later, he's there, they turn, I shoot 'em down, and then I still get shot in the shoulder by that sneaky _lǎo__tài__pó_." Mal sighed. "Did anybody see him leave the ship?" Zoe shook her head, as puzzled as her captain but not showing it.

"Nope. Jayne and I were in the cargo bay the whole time, waiting for you." Mal grimaced. He did not like puzzles, and Harry was becoming more and more of a puzzle every day. Ever since he took him onboard, in fact. He knew the boy was trustworthy, and honest (that went without saying). And he was as dear to Mal as Kaylee. Harry had the ability to bring people closer together, family-like. Hell, even Jayne, who would more than likely turn on _Serenity's_ crew for a better offer someday, had taken a liking to the boy.

"Ten-year old boys don't just 'pop' here and there without no warning, nor explanation," the captain grumbled. Zoe raised an eyebrow.

"Apparently they do, sir." Mal rolled his eyes.

"Thanks Zoe."

"Welcome, sir."

"What did Harry have to say?"

"He's got no more idea than we do about what happened. Seems as befuddled as we are."

"What if it happens again?"

"… Then we deal with it like we are now."

"We aren't dealing with it, sir," his first mate pointed out. Mal smirked morbidly.

"_Kě__ bu __shì__."_

* * *

"_Throttle"_

The stars in the window were always an awe-inspiring sight for young Harry. With Wash at his side, ready to take over if needed, he sent the little ship barrel-rolling with a whoop of laughter.

Wash smiled and laughed with him. He'd seen the 'knack', from one pilot to another, the moment little Harry had taken hold of _Serenity's _controls while Zoe held him in her lap. The sight of those two together was just plain adorable.

Wash was able to dwell on such memories because his trust in Harry was so great, and his confidence so high. The little orphan, used to thinking of himself as useless despite Mal's best efforts, was smiling a true, open-ended grin. His joy and natural skill at flight were incredible, and much like Wash's own infatuation with the journey between the stars.

"Gorram, Harry—Take it easy!" Wash warned, when the ship bucked a bit. "This isn't a broomstick, you know…"

* * *

"_Oddness"_

"I trust you can get my supplies to Serendipity on time?" Sneered the buyer clothed in black, dark, hard eyes behind greasy locks of black hair boring into Mal across the table. Mal nodded, his face masking his unease with this unusual client. Well, granted, they'd had plenty of greasy clients—their line of work, that went without saying—but none with such an unsettling disposition.

"'Course. As long as we're paid, the cargo gets where it's needed," the captain nodded, flinching at the odd smirk on the client's face. Zoe and Jayne flanking him made him feel marginally more secure; however, the greasy gent had an air of deaths in his wake.

"Then do so. You will receive the other half of the payment at Serendipity," the client hissed, shoving forward a bag of coins. Mal nodded, and Jayne grabbed it, looking down into the bag. He grimaced.

"Hey! What kind of ruttin' money is this?" The mercenary growled, annoyed, as he dumped the oddly-shaped and inscribed coins onto the table. The client's sneer grew.

"My apologies. This is my… coin collection," the client growled, scooping the coins up and producing another bag. Mal checked it this time, and nodded in approval at the platinum coins. He reached out a hand to shake on the deal, which the client ignored. Mal, a bit affronted, pulled back his hand, though was secretly glad he didn't have to actually touch the greasy _hun dan._

"Make sure it gets there, or things we become _most_ unpleasant for you and your crew," the client snarled. Mal smiled humorlessly.

"You worry none about that, Mr…?"

"Snape. Severus Snape." And with a swirl of black robes he departed out the bar doors. Zoe shook her head, and sighed.

"I don't like this, sir."

"I know… But we ain't got much choice. Sides, aint' like he asked us to cart around toxins and somesuch."

"He's a real wooly bug," Jayne snorted. "What are we doin' carting around a bunch of cer… cere…"

"Ceremonial potions? Money, Jayne. Should be enough for you to understand," Mal commented. Jayne crossed his arms.

"Still say we should have carried that nice fella's cargo, what's his name, Malfolk?"

* * *

"_Found"_

"Yeck," Kaylee commented on the snake, twisting and turning its way around the cage. Harry, holding her hand, watched the reptile in utter fascination, ignoring the bustling marketplace around them.

"I think it's shiny," Harry said with a smile. "He's neat, the way he moves about. Kind of like a little river." The mechanic squinted, and then smiled brightly.

"Yeah, he does, don't he?" Her face then fell. "Poor little thing, locked up in a cage while folks gawk at 'im."

"Couldn't we take him with us?" Implored Harry, as the snake turned its beady little eyes on the boy. "He could keep the ship free of rats."

"It's already free of rats, Harry," Kaylee smiled, shaking her head. "Besides, the captain don't allow pets." She frowned at this part.

"He wouldn't make any trouble," Harry argued. "Really!"

"Tell you what. We both talk to the captain, and see if he will let us get something at the next stop," Kaylee suggested. Harry nodded, and the two strode off. The snake, still following the dark-haired boy with its eyes, tilted its head quizzically, then winding as it was before.

* * *

"_Protection"_

"Captain, how many years old were you when you first learned to shoot?"

"About nine, except that, this ain't a ranch, and there ain't no wolves to shoot," Mal responded to Zoe with a scowl. "Harry don't need to grow up any faster than he has to."

"He needs to learn sometime," Zoe pushed. "Or do you expect him to fight with a stick when we're in trouble?" Mal rolled his eyes, before sighing his you-win-but-I-don't-have-to-gorram-like-it sigh.

"Fine. Start small, though. He ain't much bigger than the guns we have anyway."

"Sure we could dig up something, sir."

* * *

"_Identification"_

"Harry Potter! _The _Harry Potter!" Jayne blinked, from his very manly duty of carrying ammunition back to the ship, to see some weirdo dressed in robes cut through the station crowd and seize the startled boy's hand, before beginning to shake it. Kaylee, holding Harry's other hand (it was a habit the two had yet to break, despite Harry turning eleven very soon) blinked and gaped at the enthusiastic greeting.

"Uh, scuse me, sir, but--?"

"Can I get a photo, please? Or an autograph? It's for my mother, back on Diagon. She'd be _so_ happy to see you, the greatest-!"

"Move along," Jayne growled, annoyed at this _hun dan's_ proximity to Kaylee and Harry. The stranger blinked, stood up in his robes, and straightened them nervously.

"Er, what?"

"You heard me, git!" For added emphasis, the merc pulled out his long knife. The weirdo, stuttering something, quickly hurried off. Kaylee glared at him.

"Jayne! He was just bein'… Nice, you know."

"How'd he know my name?" Harry asked, extremely confused. Jayne growled.

"And what the _shiong mao niao_ is Diagon?"

* * *

_shiong mao niao_panda urine

_lǎotàipó _old woman (derogatory)

_kě__ bu __shì _Exactly/What you said is true

_TBC… 89 more to go. That's right, I'm writing a hundred!_


	3. Chapter 3

* * *

"_Sent"_

It had started with one.

It was a little, yellowed letter, tucked under his mattress in his bunk in the passenger dorm. Frowning, the boy had pulled it out and looked it over. The strange seal on the envelope seemed like the house crests some Alliance aristocrats wore on their jackets. However, he couldn't remember Inara ever mentioning one with a bird, a lion, a snake, and a badger snarling around a stylized-H. The address was even stranger:

_Harry James Potter_

Firefly-_class transport _Serenity

_Passenger Dorm 4_

His curiosity getting the better of him, he opened up the letter, and shakily read over the contents. His jaw dropped, before with a gulp, he went up to Mal, cleaning his guns on the kitchen table. Silently, at Mal's questioning look, he handed his captain the envelope. Mal's eyes scanned over them, his eyes steadily widening in disbelief. He then looked back at Harry, and licked his lips.

"So… Who do we see about this, hm?"

* * *

"_Explanations"_

"So, I'm a wizard, Mr. Hagrid?"

The gigantic man in the long, furry coat nodded, smiling kindly down at the curious Harry. The rest of _Serenity's_ crew was arranged around the living area, Jayne nervously holding Vera across his lap. When the giant had come, he'd nearly shot him dead before Mal had stopped him.

"Yep, and a righ' good'un too, once you've got some schoolin'. Ol' Dumbledore knew you'd be great the instant he laid eyes on yeh."

"And when was this?" Mal asked. Hagrid blinked, then coughed.

"Er… I'm not s'posed to talk abou' that." Mal tapped his hands on his own revolver at his side, giving the giant man a steely glare.

"I'm not letting Harry go to a school if I don't know what he's in for," the captain said in his "sergeant" voice. Despite the fact that this fellow was some kind of wizard, and gigantic to boot, Hagrid flinched at the commanding tone Mal used.

"Er, well, see sir, Harry here was orphaned when he was but one. Poor little thing, after, well…" The giant looked uncomfortable. Harry gulped, but Kaylee put a comforting arm around him.

"If you could give us a breakdown on the wizarding world, sir, we'd be much better able to support Harry in his schooling, whatever he decides," Inara interjected, her Companion training allowing her to recognize and soothe the tension that appeared. Zoe, sitting with Wash's hand holding hers, had been clutching her shotgun a bit more tightly.

"Er, well… Ah'right. See, there was this, well… Wizard. Powerfully dark wizard. Terrorized Muggles an' wizards alike, and tried to take over everything."

"Muggle…?" Prompted Kaylee.

"None-magic folk," Hagrid explained. "We call 'im You-Know-Who."

"You… Who? What's his name?" Kaylee asked, confused. The giant was looking particularly edgy.

"I can… Say his name. It's, er… Well…"

"Please, can you tell us?" Harry asked politely. The giant sighed heavily.

"Er, well, you're not s'posed to say it…"

"He was that bad, huh?" Wash asked. Jayne looked at the pilot, brow creased in confusion.

"_Shén__ me?"_

"This wizard was so powerful, so evil, did things yeh don' wan to recall…" Hagrid shuddered.

"Maybe you could write it down?" Kaylee suggested.

"Nah, can't spell it… _Voldemort."_ The giant shivered, as though the icy hand of death was creeping along his spine. "Now don' ask me to repeat it. Ever again."

"So, what's this Voldemort fella got to do with Harry?" Asked Mal, ignoring the giant's wince at the name.

"Well, when Harry was one, You-Know-Who came after the Potters, your mum and dad. Lily and James Potter, both some of the nicest, greatest people yeh could meet, and powerful opponents of You-Know-Who. He came to your family home, on Godric's Hollow, on Halloween night. He killed your dad, and your mum, but when he got to you… Well, somethin' went wrong." Hagrid grinned. "His own magic backfired on 'im, from you. He just couldn't kill you. Only left that scar on yer forehead, but him! He was gone."

"Dead?" Asked Harry. Hagrid snorted.

"Some think that. Codswallop, yeh ask me. Doubt he had enough human left in 'im to die. No, he lost all his powers, was left with nothing. And with 'im gone, his supporters surrendered, were captured, or hid away. The war was over. And it's all thanks to you!"

"But why?" Harry asked, clutching Kaylee's hand more tightly. "Why did he…?"

"No one knows. Dumbledore said he's got a few thoughts, but none he's shared wit me. No, Harry, it's a complete mystery. You stumped You-Know-Who, that's for sure."

"So, why are you coming here, telling all this now?" Mal asked pointedly. "Who's this Dumbledore?"

"Albus Dumbledore! E's the headmaster of Hogwarts, the biggest wizarding school in the system!" The giant proclaimed proudly. "And greatest wizard o' the age. Well, see, eleven's the year tha' a wizard or witch is supposed to start schooling. I'm the groundskeeper at the school, an' the keeper of keys. And Dumbledore, well… Even e' couldn't find out where you had got to. He'd left you wit' your aunt an' uncle for safe keepin'-"

"_Safe keeping!"_ Snarled Mal. "Did Dumbledore ever _think_ to look in on Harry? Huh?"

"Well, er, e'-" Hagrid began.

"They _starved him._ Made him do the gorram cooking and cleaning! A little boy! They beat him and treated him like dirt! And you call that _safe keeping!"_ Mal roared, making everyone jump. Zoe looked concernedly at her captain, moving to try and keep him from doing something stupid. With Harry, Mal could never think straight. In him, he saw another little boy, left without parents because of some higher power's dictates. He saw himself, and his staunch refusal to let Harry suffer as he had.

"Sir?"

"I want to meet this gorram _wú__yòng__lǎo__hàn_ myself, if you don't mind! Before I send Harry off to a school _run _by him!" The captain deathglared the giant, his gun out faster than anyone could blink. "Now, get your _pei gu_ off my boat, and tell Dumbledore to meet us on Persephone when we touch down, _dong ma?_"

Hagrid coughed, frankly looking shocked, before nodding stiffly and sticking a hand into a pocket amid his numerous furs. He brought out a box, and set it on the table.

"Er, Harry? Made ya a birthday cake. Just so's you and the others could have a proper party. None of tha' nasty protein _go se._" The giant smiled kindly at Mal and Harry, nodding. "I understand, why you might want this. And it's good. Means yeh care abou' him. And besides," the giant related, hand raised to the side of his huge beard in a sly smile. "I wanted to keep 'im too." And with that, the giant vanished with a woosh of breeze. All was silent for a few moments.

"So, can the kid turn lead into gold?" Asked Jayne. Everyone ignored him.

"Shiny. Badger's expecting this cargo, while there's a bulletin out on us… And now this," Mal sighed. He turned and looked at Harry critically, who flinched. "Relax. I'm not blaming you, Harry. But things just keep piling up…"

_87 to go…_


	4. Chapter 4

"_Market"_

"Ain't seen so many folks wearin' dresses before," Jayne sniffed, as he, Mal, Harry, and Zoe walked through Diagon Alley. Located on Persephone, this magical hub of commerce was a short stop before heading to Badger's to offload the goods.

Hagrid had said that Dumbledore would be expecting them, in the local bank. Gringotts, it was called. Mal took one look at the goblins working the place and decided right then and there that this was one place he didn't want to try to rob. As lucrative as doing business with the magical world might be, he doubted they'd survive the attempt. Was that a _dragon_ guarding one of the vaults?

"Can we-?" Jayne asked, predictably, as they arrived at Harry's vault. Mal shut him up with a glare.

"No. This is Harry's money, it ain't for nothing else but his schooling," Mal declared, as they stood outside the chamber filled to the roof with gold. Harry, in extreme guilt, opened his mouth to offer to split the money his parents had left him, when a look from Mal stopped him.

"This is yours, Harry, dong ma? You keep it for your schooling."

"But… But _Serenity_-!"

"Is allright," Mal soothed. "Look, if you want to share your money with us? Wait until you're done with your schooling."

"How long is that?" Jayne whined. Zoe rolled her eyes.

"Jayne, shut up already."

"_Rags"_

School robes were all Harry wanted—He preferred the baggy Asian-style pants and button-up shirts in his wardrobe on Serenity to such… loose garments. Mal, on the other hand, rather liked the open-style of wizard robes, and sprang for a few adult-sized ones in the bargain bins. Kaylee would especially like the pink-patterned one with ruffles, he thought…

"Where the hell is Dumbledore?" He muttered, as they progressed from Malkin's clothing shop to the local bookstore. Zoe shrugged.

"No sight of anyone matchin' the description, sir."

"If he's gonna just pop out unexpectedly for fun, I swear, I'm gonna shoot him," the captain growled.

"That would not be wise," intoned a quiet voice from behind the group. In an instant, the old man with the long beard, half-moon spectacles, and purple robes and hat had five guns trained on him. The older wizard looked over his spectacles with a twinkling smile at the focused-looking Harry.

"A Theodore ASP. Small, simple, concealable. Excellent weapon choice for a young man on the fringes of the system." The wizard looked up at Jayne, who had Phoebe and Janet pointed at Dumbledore's head and heart. "Your recommendation, I presume?"

"Kid's a good shot. Deserves one of the best handguns ever made," the mercenary growled with a hint of pride. Mal and Zoe rolled their eyes, while Harry blushed sheepishly.

"_Protect"_

"Placing Harry in the care of the Dursleys was the option that offered the most protection from Lord Voldemort's followers," the old wizard began, sipping a strange fizzy drink at an outdoor café in the Alley. Mal and the others had simple water, and still had their hands on their guns.

"But not from the Dursleys," Zoe observed flatly. Dumbledore sighed heavily.

"I knew that I was consigning Harry to a difficult life… But the life he had before meeting you was preferable to capture by Death Eaters. And before you shoot me for saying so, hear me out: The Death Eaters are masters of the three Unforgivable Curses. They could have turned Harry into their child sex slave, or made him mutilate himself for fun, tortured him with pure pain and complete agony, or simply ended his life right there." The wizard shook his head.

"I chose the lesser of two evils, Harry… And I am sorry that life dealt me so few options. But you are safe now, Harry. And with a family that loves you."

"Yes. I am," Harry responded quietly… Before sitting up, walking around the table, and punching the shocked Dumbledore in the nose, sending him falling flat on his back to the pavement. Zoe went and helped the elderly wizard up, while Mal and Jayne pulled Harry a short distance away.

"Harry… Next time you feel like punching some folk who's wronged you? Tell me first," Mal murmured quietly. Harry sighed and looked down, ashamed.

"I'm sorry. I knew I shouldn't have, but-"

"Shouldn't have! Of course you should have! I wanted to know when I should hold him still and let you punch him some more!" Mal exclaimed.

"Could I get a few licks in? Nothing I hate more than some _BUN tyen-shung duh ee-DWAY-RO_ thinks he can play God," Jayne growled. "Well, aside from not gettin' paid."

"Jayne," Mal growled warningly. Jayne blanched.

"What? I didn't mean the obscenely huge piles of gold in Little Harry's vault! I didn't!"

"_Brothers"_

The wand hummed in power, bringing a smile to Harry's face as he held it. He waved it about a few times, feeling the magical core within bonding to his own seamlessly.

"_Dah! Jing-tsai!"_

Mr. Olivander frowned thoughtfully, then took the wand back, examining it closely.

"Curious, curious… This wand's core, a phoenix feather… Was from a phoenix that gave one additional feather… but only one. The core of the wand that did… This," the ancient wizard pointed to the scar on Harry's forehead, which made the young boy gape. Mal pushed the wizard's hand away, and tapped the counter impatiently.

"Shiney. Can we check out now?" The wandmaker was giving Mal no end of the willies.

"_Cleaning Up"_

"Brooms… Why all the fuss over brooms?" Jayne asked incredulously, looking at the crowd gathered outside a window of a shop with a fancy-looking broom within.

"What are you, stupid?" Asked an imperious-looking blond child. "That's a Nimbus 2000 racing broom, the best Quidditch broom in the system!"

"Quidditch? What the _guay_ is Quidditch?" Jayne asked, brow furrowed. The blonde boy turned up his nose.

"You must be some _bèn-ài-huāng_ to not know what Quidditch is!" Jayne's face crumpled in anger.

"Why you little _hun dahn_!" Jayne seized the boy, covering his mouth before he could scream, then stuffed him in a trash can, where his cries of anger and indignation were muffled. Jayne, slapping his hands clean, headed off, though somewhat puzzled:

_What does mud blood mean_?

"_Tickets"_

"All aboard! All aboard!" Kaylee cried, grinning out to the crowd passing by. Her face lit up even more when Harry came up, a trunk with a white bird in a cage trudging behind him.

"_Dì di_! See you come back from your shopping trip! How was it?"

"Not bad… I punched out a school professor, got me a nice owl, found out I'm filthy rich, and have a wan similar to the one Voldemort used," Harry replied nonchalantly, as he headed into Serenity, leaving a gawping Kaylee behind. Her mouth closed, before turning and smiling out into the crowds again.

"Excuse, miss?" A well-dressed gentleman with glasses stepped up to her. Kaylee's smile grew a bit.

"Yes, sir?"

"I would like passage on your ship, to Haven if you please? My name is Doctor Simon Tam…"

_81 to go…_

_Di di _little brother

_bèn-ài-huāng _Stupid mud blood

_guay _Hell

_BUN tyen-shung duh ee-DWAY-RO _Stupid inbred stack of meat

_Dah! Jing tsai! _Great! Brilliant!


	5. Chapter 5

"_Weight"_

Harry sat solemnly, looking down at his feet as they dangled over the edge of his bunk. In his hands was his reliable ASP, feeling incredibly heavy despite missing three rounds.

"Don't let it eat at you." The small boy looked up into the kind eyes of Mal, as he closed the door behind him. He sat next to Harry, looking down at the gun in Harry's hand as well.

"… He was gonna shoot River. Already had hurt the shepherd," he murmured quietly. "He was going to turn us all over to the Alliance. But…"

"But… Killing him doesn't make you as bad as he was," Mal added quietly. "Remember what I told you? About that passage in the Bible?"

"That… It was mistranslated. 'Thou shalt not kill', should be 'thou shalt not murder'." Harry sighed. "I murdered today. I wasn't in a war."

"Murder is killing someone because you want to. Because the need to end their life has consumed you. For gold, anger, lust… All sorts of sins. Sin motivates murder, Harry." Mal shook his head with a proud smile.

"When you shot that man, no sin motivated you. I'm not saying killing folk is ever easy. It's not. You might think that over time it does, but every time I do so, believe me, it pains me something fierce." Mal took a deep breath, and let it out slowly.

"But it's good that it pains you to kill." Harry blinked, and looked up at Mal curiously.

"Why?"

"Because, it means you're still a person… And not just a killer." Mal shook his head, and looked Harry right in the eyes.

"As long as you feel guilt, Harry, you are still good. It's a pain that keeps you alive."

"_Terminal"_

_Serenity_, being a _Firefly-_class transport, was indeed a great deal older than the majority of starship designs in use by humanity. Newer vessels packed more advanced computers, electronics, powerplant control, and living conditions.

What _Serenity_ lacked in these creature comforts, however, was easily exceeded by her rugged dependability, adaptability, and maneuverability. Where fancy sensors and engines broke down, and increased comforts equaled increased weight and lowered mobility, a _Firefly_ would keep flying, keep moving, and keep her crew alive.

Landing _Serenity_ in a nearby meadow that advanced computers and guidance systems would warn off as far too narrow to set down in, was potent proof of the rugged transport ship's abilities.

"Now, we're gonna take Harry to the train station to head for school. Then, we're off to meet Niska for our next job," Mal ordered. He turned to Wash, standing on the ramp of _Serenity,_ as Kaylee fixed up the mule for the trip to the local rail hub. Harry's belongings were tossed into the back of the mule's towed trailer, his snowy white owl, Hedwig, hooting indignantly at the loud sounds of the vehicle's engine.

"Not to fret, Hedwig! It's shiney, it's shiney!" Kaylee cooed to the owl, who ruffled her feathers in protest. Once Kaylee snuck her a bit of leftover flavored protein, the owl calmed down.

"Gorram bird! Glad to see it go!" Jayne growled. He shook his head at Harry's glare.

"Now listen boy! Clean your weapons at least-"

"Once a week. Weekends. And don't spend no more time on it than you have to. I want you studying, Harry! Got it?" Mal stated to the young wizard. He nodded, smiling sadly.

"I'm gonna miss you… All of you." He yelped as Inara pulled a hat over his head from behind. The Companion grinned.

"Don't worry. I drilled him through all his text books. He'll be fine. Harry, this hat should keep your head warm. Did you pack your dress robes?"

"Yes Inara," Harry replied, nodding with a grin. "Not sure why I need so many though."

"Church demands it, boy! You go to church and keep yourself saved!" Jayne stated flatly. Mal rolled his eyes.

"They're to impress pretty girl witches, and for catching folk unawares who mean to do you harm, _dong ma?_ Now… Got your ASPs?"

"Yup."

"Sawed off shotgun?"

"Aye!"

"Revolvers? Spare pistol? Knife?"

Harry nodded to all three.

"Grenades?" Asked Jayne. Zoe, just now emerging from the cargo bay, rolled her eyes.

"Jayne, what's he gonna need grenades for?" Jayne shrugged.

"Better to have grenades than… not have grenades," he explained with an awkward cough. Mal rolled his eyes and smirked.

"Take care of yourself, Harry. We'll see you for your first vacation," Mal said with a smile. Harry returned it, uneasily. He hesitated… Before hugging Mal quickly. Malcolm returned it, gingerly, before pushing the small boy towards the bike. Harry wrapped his arms tightly around Kaylee, who smiled and winked at Mal.

"Relax Captain, I'll have him there and back in no time!"

"I think I'll make sure of that," Mal said with a small smile. He got on the back of the bike, and held onto the rear handlebars for passengers. He turned to Zoe.

"Remember… We're not back in an hour?" Zoe rolled her eyes.

"Dramatic rescue?" Mal grinned.

"_Bang Bang"_

Getting on the train had been uneventful, if a bit embarrassing. Harry thought he'd die of embarrassment after asking one of the station attendants where platform 9 and ¾ was located. Fortunately, they'd run into an old friend of Mal's, Dan Granger, who used to be a surgeon in the Browncoat Fleet. Now he was a dentist, and had married another dentist to open up their own practice on the Dyton Colony. And with them was their cute little daughter, all bushy-brown haired and so talkative even Kaylee winced at it.

After another hug goodbye from both Mal and Kaylee, Harry had gotten onto the train, the Granger's daughter following him and still chattering.

"The Dyton colony's actually a whole lot better than they say. Plenty of wizards and witches, I got to know more about the culture and history, along with reading all the books I could find. I've now read _Hogwarts, A History_ twice! It's very fascinating, how the school was shipped, brick by brick, from Earth-That-Was. It's over two thousand years old! I've already memorized the headmasters…" Harry, despite Mal and Kaylee's misgivings, was actually relieved that the Granger daughter was with him. That he wasn't the only Muggle-born wizard going to school, for the first time. And she seemed knowledgeable and nice enough, if a bit chatty.

"So, er…"

"Hermione. Like the Greek," Hermione answered, slightly annoyed that her impromptu lecture had been interrupted. She sized him up. "You don't look anything like Captain Reynolds."

"Er, I'm not his son," Harry laughed. Hermione, blinking, smiled with her oversized front teeth shining in the light of the compartment.

"Really? I guess it was the clothes." Harry looked down at his long, dark-brown coat, blue button-up shirt, gunbelt, khaki pants, and boots. He blushed slightly.

"Er… I like 'em," he mumbled slightly. Hermione smiled.

"I like them too." Harry looked up at Hermione, and blinked. She kept smiling.

"So, what's your name?"

"Harry… Harry Potter." Unlike the other times he'd told his name to other wizards and witches, Hermione did not squeal or gawp. She just smiled and nodded.

"I read about you. You know, I thought you'd be taller." Harry frowned.

"Well, er…" Hermione stood up and shook Harry's hand warmly.

"It's allright. I'm glad to meet you anyway."

The door sliding open instantly brought Harry to bring his gun to bear on the person entering. The red-headed boy with freckles and a maroon jumper gawked stupidly at the device, while Hermione blinked.

"Uh… Sorry… Can I sit here? What's that thing, anyway?" The boy pointed to the Theodore ASP. Harry, embarrassed, put the gun away.

"Sorry. Bit of a habit. Sure, there's plenty of room," Harry said. "What's your name?"

"Ronald Weasley, but call me Ron…"

"_Dragon"_

"Well well well… It's true, then. Harry Potter has come to Hogwarts," sneered a cold, high-pitched voice as the first years wlaked up the steps to the entrance to Hogwarts castle. Harry, frankly, was amazed by the size of the place, but Hermione seemed to know a lot about it, which put him more at ease. He turned and looked at the speaker, a pale blonde boy with an arrogant smirk on his face.

"Er, yes. I am. I have. Pleased to meet you." Harry responded politely. Inara had taught him that manners were always good for alleviating possible tensions. Mal was of the opinion that manners could let you lull the other guy into a false sense of security so you could shoot first. Harry, at the moment, stuck with Inara's view of things.

"Draco Malfoy. Of the Malfoy Family," Draco said grandly, holding out his hand. Clearly the boy expected Harry to react with awe, so Harry managed to smile in a way he'd seen Inara smile when she practiced in front of a mirror.

"Pleasure to meet you, Draco," he accepted the hand, and shook it, nodding politely. Draco cast a critical eye over Ron and Hermione who were flanking Harry, and sniffed.

"Really Harry, in here, your friends define who you are. You are judged based on the company you keep. I'm sure you would agree?" Harry cast a glance over at a pair of first years boys who were, quite frankly, huge. Both had vacant smiles and nodded dumbly with every word Draco said—Picture perfect hired muscle, as Jayne would put it. Harry nodded and kept up his Companion Smile.

"Oh, most definitely," he spoke with a subtle hint of irony. Hermione giggled, while Ron stood awkwardly.

"Then, you most definitely shouldn't be keeping the same company with _scum_ like a Weasley," Draco sneered. "Poor, downtrodden, inbred _hun dahn_ family. Stick with me, and you'll be set! We're all Slytherins here, after all." Harry raised his eyebrows at Ron, who looked ashamed. He had the same big-family background that Kaylee had, and was definitely a good, if a bit sheltered, guy. And Draco… Well, he was just like every other spoiled, aristocratic spawn of rich, arrogant parents.

"I think I'll let the hat decide that, thank you though," Harry replied sincerely. Draco smirked in a triumphant sort of way, and led his goons after a tall, middle-aged witch who introduced herself as Professor McGonnagal. They were led to the great hall, which Hermione described excitedly from her readings of _Hogwarts: A History._

After the Sorting Hat's song (which amazed Harry to no end), the first years were called up and sorted. Hermione and Ron went to Gryffindor, while Draco and his cronies went to Slytherin. When his name was called, Harry ignored the whispering of the crowd, and sat on the stool. McGonnagal placed the hat on Harry's head.

_Hmm… Hello there!_

_What the _guay!

_Language, young Potter. Hmm… Definitely brains, if applied. Honest, that's good! Inquisitive, even better! Determined, brave, and a thirst to prove yourself. I think you might do well in Slytherin, myself._

Harry, thinking of Malfoy and the rest of the Slytherin bunch, grimaced.

Bee juay! _I don't want to go with them!_

_Are you sure? You could do great things in Slytherin, you know. You would do well in that house._

_Yes, yes, and I'd probably do just as well in a House that _wasn't_ filled with spoiled rich kids. _

_Hrm… Not Slytherin, then?_

_Bloody hell no! _

_Allright then… Better make it…_

"GRYFFINDOR!"

"_Altitude"_

"Now that was one hell of a trick," commented Mal, as the crew watched the monitor on the narrow-wave tracker in Harry's luggage. It had jumped from Persephone, all the way to a supposedly dead planet on the mid-rim of the system.

"Least we know where he's at," Jayne commented. "In case his ass needs bailing."

"Aw, he'll be fine!" Kaylee smiled. "Harry'll take care of himself."

"Excuse me… Can someone explain to me how a train on Persephone… Got all the way to that planet without leaving the ground?" Asked Simon, perplexed. Shepherd Book shook his head with a knowing smile.

"Captain? Should we?" Mal sighed.

"Well, if you're gonna be on this boat, I suppose there are a few things you need to know…"

_76 to go…_

_Yes, Shepherd Book knows about the magical world. How, well, we'll find out next chapter. I know, I'm evil. Mwahahahaha!_


	6. Chapter 6

"_Venom"_

"Tell me, Mr. Potter, what would I get if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood?" Harry blinked up at the looming Professor Snape. Across the classroom, Malfoy and a few of his Slytherin goons were grinning at him.

"Don't know?" Snape sneered. Harry, noticing Hermione's hand waving frantically next to his head, figured it out: The Potions professor enjoyed singling out his students for humiliation. Well then, if that was the case…

"They create a sleeping potion called the Draught of the Living Dead," Harry answered, now appreciating the drills Inara and Mal had run him through, to remember numerous potions and incantations and other data he was to learn about in school. Clearly, Snape was disappointed that he hadn't been able to humiliate Harry. He tried again.

"Where might I find a beozar, Potter?"

"… Goat's stomach. Cures most poisons," Harry answered, frowning a bit mentally while keeping up his studious mask. He kept getting thr feeling that Snape had something more on him than the simple tormenting-teacher gig. The greasy man's sneer became more pronounced.

"And what, is the difference between Monkshood and Wolfsbane?" He posed acidly. Harry actually smiled at this. _So he thinks he's got a _bun _kid, hm?_

"None. They're the same plant, just different names," Harry recited.

"Well, Mr. Potter, clearly you feel that fame allows you to show… off. Whatever audiences you catered to before, know that no one here will be impressed by such _simple_ knowledge. Five points from Gryffindor." Snape stalked away to begin the lesson. Harry saw Hermione give him a smile, and he found himself smiling back.

"_Wuh de ma,_ why are you two smiling?" Ron hissed from behind. "We just lost five House points!"

"But we annoyed Snape," Harry returned quietly. "I've got a feeling that's an art in itself."

"Plus, the professor was asking about potions we don't cover until the _end_ of the textbook," Hermione whispered, smiling triumphantly at Ron. "_See_, I'm not the only one who reads all the way through the books!"

"_Kwong-juh duh_, both of you," Ron muttered, going silent as Snape loomed back over the Gryffindor side of the room.

"_Cat"_

It had taken Harry nearly a month to find the perfect place. With the crazy movements of the doors, stairs and room in Hogwarts, locating a consistently empty, secluded room was difficult at best.

Especially when you were a lowly first year. Argus Filch, the insane caretaker of the castle, tried to hunt you down for the most minor of infractions in that case.

"Hm? What is it, Mrs. Norris?" The elderly caretaker inquired, with a sick kind of anticipation in his tone. "A couple rutting in the broomcloset, is it?" The caretaker banged his broom against the closet. Upon hearing no screams of fear or shock, he threw open the closet and peered in for himself.

"What… What's a can of sardines doin' in here? Nasty rotten maggots, leaving food out for me to clean up-" Harry sprang out of his hiding place, slamming the caretaker in the lower back with a carefully balanced tackle. Filch yelped as he crashed into the broomcloset, Mrs. Norris yowling like a banshee, as Harry slammed the door shut. He winced as the screams of the caretaker and his cat grew in noise, before rushing away as silently as he could go. He stopped and hid in the shadows of a statue of a sphinx, and watched as several teachers crowded around the source of the disturbance. He then smirked, before creeping stealthily away to a secret room. Ducking in, he gasped as he came face-to-face with a very upset-looking Hermione, and grinning Ron.

"Harry James Potter! What on _earth_ do you think you're doing?" She demanded.

"Why didn't you let me in on this! Really mate, shoving Filch into a broomcloset! _Jing tsai!_ Ow!" Ron winced as Hermione elbowed him. He glared at her. "What was _that_ for?"

"You didn't have to come along, you know," Hermione huffed irritably. "_You _just came along because _you_ wanted to break rules too! And Harry! What _exactly _have you been _doing_ out here late at night?"

"Er… Um… Well… Hermione, you have to understand, well…" Harry began. Hermione's deathglare prompted him to speed up.

"I needed a place to practice my shooting." He got out. Hermione rolled her eyes.

"Hagrid would be _more_ than happy to let you practice on the grounds! He said so himself!" Harry grinned roguishly.

"Yeah, but this way's more fun," he explained. Ron nodded with a silly grin on his face, before Hermione slapped them both on the shoulders, prompting a wounded look from Harry and a yelp from Ron.

"Ow, Hermione… That really hurt!"

"Do you have to hit so hard?"

"Ooo… Ickle firsties!" Cackled an oily voice above them. All three looked up to see the smirking Peeves hovering above them. Harry, in an instant, reacted, shoving Hermione and Ron out the door before they broke into a run.

"ICKLE FIRSTIES! ICKLE FIRSTIES! OUT OF BED! OUT OF BED! RIGHT HERE!" Peeves bellowed, while the three first years ran as fast as they could.

"_Mouse"_

Rounding many corners and rushing up many flights of stairs, the three finally made it into a room to catch their breath. Harry kept his ear to the door, and hearing no activity coming near, turned and sighed in relief. Hermione, catching her breath, finally looked up and blinked. Ron next to her, sighed and shook his head.

"We're safe," he pronounced. Hermione's silence prompted Harry to look where she was looking. He gaped.

"Not really," he whispered. Ron turned, and looked at the three pairs of furious eyes and three mouths of razor-sharp teeth above his head.

"_Gway,"_ he muttered, before they all screamed and ran from the huge, three-headed dog's angry snarls and barks.

They didn't stop running until they collapsed, exhausted, in the safety of the empty common room.

"You know… What… Hermione?" Harry panted.

"What?"

"Next time… I'll ask Hagrid… For shooting practice time…"

"We'll _both_ ask, mate," Ron gasped out.

"_Wings"_

The revelation from Hagrid about why the terrible, three-headed dog monster (called "Fluffy", of all things) was in the school answered a few more questions Harry had about the wizarding world. For instance, about the so-called Sorcerer's Stone. Hagrid apparently felt that, since Harry's crew was already keeping mum about a pair of wanted fugitives onboard _Serenity,_ Harry could keep mum about the Stone. Naturally, Dumbledore had dropped in on Hagrid just as he was about to get to the good part (ostensibly for tea, but he rubbed his nose when he said this to the Trio), so the three first years had proceeded to head for their first flight lesson.

"Now then, everyone, simply hold out your hand over your broom, and say 'up'," Professor Hooch, a yellow-eyed, gray-haired woman who looked like a hawk, instructed. Harry did so, and was pleased to find that the broom came to his hand in an instant. He grinned as the other students (even Hermione), had to repeat the command several times before getting the broom to their hand. Save for Draco Malfoy, who looked as though he probably had a few flying brooms at home.

"Now then, to mount your brooms-Longbottom, what are you doing!" Harry winced as Neville Longbottom's broom bucked up hard between his legs, making him cry out in pain, as the broom ascended and wobbled about in the air. Despite Professor Hooch's continued yelling, Neville finally ended up slamming into one of the castle battlements, and fell thirty feet. He landed with a thud, and started crying in pain as he held his arm. Malfoy and his goons began to laugh, as Hooch took Neville gingerly by his good arm's elbow and led him inside.

"No one goes into the air until I get back, that understood?" She commanded, before vanishing into the castle. Harry sighed, shaking his head. He'd been looking forward to flying a broom ever since he entered Diagon Alley.

"Looks like this thing doesn't work, since Longbottom forgot to fall on his fat ass," broke Draco Malfoy's pompous voice into Harry's musings. He looked up, and glowered at Malfoy, enchanting his band of Slytherin cronies with an exaggerated reproduction of Neville's disastrous first flight, Neville's rememberal (a little sphere that glowed when you had forgotten something—a frequent occurrence for Neville) in his hand. He noticed Harry's distasteful look, and sneered at him.

"What, Potter? Don't like me talking about Longbottom like that? Maybe he's your girlfriend—Doesn't look like he'll be pitching _anything."_ Harry smirked back.

"Guess you'd be _very_ interested in that, wouldn't you, Malfoy?" Replied Harry with a suggestive lilt to his eyebrows. Malfoy flushed in anger as a few of the Gryffindors laughed behind Harry, before mounting his broom and kicking off, maneuvering lazily above the crowd of students.

"Hey! Get down from there! You're going to get in trouble!" Hermione shouted. Malfoy sneered down at her.

"Shut it, you _ài-huāng biǎo zi!_" Harry, later, wouldn't remember exactly when he'd mounted his broom, but it seemed only an instant passed between Mafoy's insult reached his ears, and he found himself staring down the blonde pretty-boy, broom-to-broom. Harry's fist pulled back, ready to smash in Draco's smirking face.

"Harry, no!" Hermione shouted from below, which made Harry pause. That was all the time Draco needed to throw the rememberal, smirking at Harry in triumph. As quick as a flash, Harry spun about on his broom, kicking Malfoy's from below to slam into his crotch, before flying after the rememberal at full speed. He snatched it just before it smashed against the castle walls, finally struck by just how _easy_ flying this broom was. It came to him even more naturally than flying _Serenity_.

He came in for a landing, to the cheers of several Gryffindors. Hermione was giving him a disapproving look, before shaking her with a sigh.

"Gah… You'll pay… for this… Potter!" Draco screeched in a high-pitched voice. Harry looked through the crowd to see Draco clutching his privates in agony, his broom underneath him as the Slytherins crowded about him. Harry froze when a firm hand gripped his shoulder. He turned around, and looked up into the steely gaze of Professor McGonnagal. He opened his mouth.

"Mr. Potter… I believe we have some things to talk about," she stated flatly.

"_Three"_

"So they made you the Quidditch team Seeker?" Ron asked, looking frankly winded in excitement. Harry shrugged, embarrassed.

"Guess I impressed her. Professor McGonnagal said I fly just like my father did," he answered, as the Trio was doing their homework in the common room. Hermione, sitting on the other side of the table, shook her head.

"Harry… Why did you do that? I mean… yes… He did call me…"

"A mudblood whore," Harry grimaced, as did Ron. "I'm sorry, Hermione. But, well… You're my friend. And nobody calls my friends whores. Well… That's not exactly true," Harry amended, thinking of Mal and Inara's frequent fights. He shook his head.

"The point is I was defending your honor. He shouldn't get away with _go se_ like that."

"I didn't _ask_ you to," Hermione replied, with a sigh. She smiled at him. "But thanks anyway."

"What are friends for?" Harry asked with a smile at her. Ron rolled his eyes.

"Bloody hell, nobody deserves to be called that… Not even some know-it-all," Ron surmised. "I would have hexed him if Harry hadn't gotten to him first."

"But you don't _know_ any hexes, Ron," Hermione sighed. Ron shrugged.

"So?" Ron then frowned. "I don't get it, though… Didn't you have your gun?"

"Yes," Harry said. Ignoring Hermione's outraged sputter, Ron continued:

"Then why didn't you shoot him?"

"Because, _stupid,_ it would have killed him!" Hermione groaned. Ron's ears turned red as he scowled at her.

"It would not! They only hurt pumpkins! I've seen it!"

"You are _such_ a git, Ron! Harry was right to not shoot him! But I don't think you should carry your gun around either! You might get in trouble!" Harry nodded.

"You're probably right, Hermione. After all," Harry grinned, "the way things are at this school, the temptation to shoot someone is just going to get harder to ignore…"

"_Curiosity Killed…"_

Ron raised the gun, gingerly. He took aim at a candle standing on top of the wooden fence surrounding Hagrid's pumpkin patch, just like he'd seen Harry do. Carefully, he pulled the trigger.

_Click._ Ron frowned. He tried again.

_Click. Click. Click._

"What the _gway_ is wrong with this thing?" He muttered. He shook the gun irritably. He froze when Fred and George, both holding guns, appeared in his sight, grinning at him.

"Might try loading it first," opined George.

"Doesn't work when it's not loaded. Ask Harry," added Fred.

"What? But, but… _What_ are you two doing with guns?" Ron asked. Fred grinned, followed by George.

"Harry said we could practice."

"In exchange for our services."

"A little of this, a little of that…"

"Well… Why won't he let me practice?" Ron whined. Fred and George looked at eachother, and rolled their eyes.

"You might try asking first."

"Plus, he knew you were going to 'borrow' his gun. Made sure you didn't know it wasn't loaded."

"Ah, he's a man after our own heart."

"Like our third twin, really."

Ron growled angrily. "This isn't fair!"

"Hey, don't blame us for you not asking first!" Fred stated.

"Besides, that gun's recoil would break your hand," George noted. Ron blinked.

"Really? It would?"

"Definitely. I'd be willing to show you how to shoot it safely?" Ron yelped, and spun around to find Harry standing behind him, in his long-brown coat rather than the school robes. He blinked.

"How did you-?"

"Stealth, mate. Stealth." Harry grinned. "Heard of it?"

"Just in reference to Fred and George, by mum."

"She always did know us best," Fred sighed dramatically.

"Wonderful for us, not as well as she thinks," George winked.

_70 to go…_

_Sorry if Harry seems too OOC, but considering he was raised for five years on _Serenity,_ it's probably not surprising he'd adopt a few mannerisms and attitudes from such an environment. Of course, this is _not_ Super-Harry. More like a much more Sneaky and Worldly-View Harry. After all: After living on _Serenity,_ school house points probably wouldn't seem very important…_

_At the moment, the _Serenity_ crew is busy with the first couple episodes, but don't worry. Harry will receive and send mail to them in the next chapter. And I promise, it'll be something to behold. Until then, keep watching! And please keep in mind: I have a LOT more than just this story to read…_

_Wuh de ma_ Mother of god!

_Kwong-juh duh_ Crazy!

_ài-huāng biǎo zi!_ Mudblood whore!

_go se _ Crap

_gway _Hell


	7. Chapter 7

"_Harry's First Letter"_

Dear everyone,

School's going allright, but a lot of peculiar things have been going on lately. Please feed Hedwig when she gets this to you—Owls seem to need a lot more energy to be sent to other planets than people do. It's something called Apparation, like teleporting in those old science fiction stories.

First things first though: I'm doing well in all my classes, and like most of them. Potions, with a Professor Snape, is awful, since he likes tormenting the Gryffindors (that's the house I got in!) and is always showing favoritism to his own house, Slytherin. He's really greasy, long, disgusting hair that makes your eyes water to look at it.

I have been making new friends. Hermione Granger is my best friend. She's very understanding and smart, but can be bossy sometimes. Ron Weasley is a pureblood wizard, and the youngest boy out of a family of six older brothers and one daughter. He, his two older brothers Fred and George (twins), and Percy Weasley, the third eldest son, are all friends of mine. Another boy, Neville Longbottom, has also become my friend. He's kind of forgetful and bad at nearly everything in school except Herbology.

I'm having problems with a boy named Draco Malfoy. He likes to insult and goad me into stuff, especially in Potions class since Snape doesn't do anything. I usually don't care, since he's a pasty _hun dan_ but when he called Hermione a mudblood whore (a very bad insult in the wizarding world) I kicked him on his broomstick and made him crash (it was funny).

Oh! Best news! I'm part of the Gryffindor Quidditch team, a Seeker! I sent along a pamphlet our team coach, Oliver Wood, gave me, so you can all know what it's about. Our first game is next week: I hope you all can come. It doesn't cost anything, and there are free concessions.

I can't help missing you all terribly. I worry about you and hope you're all all right. How did the job with Niska go? How are Simon and River?

I hope you like the chocolate frogs and other magic sweets I sent with Hedwig. But be careful: The frogs jump in your stomach a bit after eating. Say hi to Serenity for me!

Love to you all,

_Harry_

"_Inara's Letter"_

Dear Harry,

I'm glad to hear you're doing well in school! And even more glad that you have joined the Quidditch team. Don't worry about Hedwig: Kaylee's taking care of her with a bag of owl treats you left behind.

_Serenity_ is not the same without you. Kaylee's happy face brightens our days, but we all miss you and hope to see you soon.

Life has been… Hectic, to say the least. Mal has nearly gotten us all killed at least three times in the last few months. I'll let him tell his side, but allow me to simply say that I am amazed he isn't dead. Please, try to convince him to be less reckless. He actually listens to you. Jayne is still the same, River and Simon are settling in (though we had a brief scare on an outer moon), as is the Shepherd. Kaylee seems very taken with our new doctor, and is causing all of us no end of amusement. Zoe and Wash are all right too, very happy as of late. Mark my words, we will be there to see your first game, or Mall will suffer dearly.

Take care of yourself, _di di,_

Inara

_"Mal's Letter"_

Dear Harry,

Whatever Inara doubtless told you in her letter (I will never get used to your bird popping in like that), it's not true. All folk tales she spun because she's upset with me for some gorram reason. Ain't my fault, ya see?

Now that that's out of the way: I'm glad you're doing well, and you're on the Quidditch team. I knew Hermione's pa back in the war: He's raised her right and true, and I'm glad you befriended her.

Snape? I think we shipped some-such potions for him a while back. While I think most teachers are allowed their own quirks and differences, don't be afraid to let 'im know you don't sit for _go se_ from nobody.

Seems you inherited our ability to make enemies wherever you go. Glad to hear you put that _pee gu_ in his place. Aint' nobody deserve to be called whores, ceptin' those that are.

Simon and River are settled. It's good to have a trained doctor aboard, we do seem to need them at least once a week. River's a lot of a mystery, and a lot of chaos. The preacher's bein' his nosy self, Jayne's Jayne, Kaylee's still bursting with sunshine, Zoe's bein' more sarcastic than is her usual, Wash's got all sorts of new games with his toy dinosaurs, and Inara's still at what she does best.

The train job? Went south. Remember, you never take a cargo that other folk need for life, that you only need for cashy money. And I got in a swordfight. Some primped client o' Inara's. Word o' wisdom: Getting stabbed hurts. I don't recommend it.

I'll be glad to have this run done. We should be there for your first game next week, just have to make a stop on Triumph for local trouble resolution. Keep your guns clean and ears open, little one. You'll be just fine.

_Mal_

"_Kaylee's Letter"_

Nee Hao di di!

I'm glad you're havin' fun and doing well in school! Things is all right here, for the most part. Captain got himself into a duel, Simon and River got themselves kidnapped by hill folk (we got 'em back though), the ship got searched by the Alliance (we got out just fine though!) and we gave back a whole mess of medicine to a poor village.

Shepherd got shot, but he's okay now. Recovering perfectly. And we delivered a nice herd o' cows that got us some nice monies. Ooh! Best part of the Captain's duel, was that I got to go to a fancy party, and got this _suai_ dress. Most darlin' thing you ever did see, with ruffles and pink laces and all sorts of adorable fixins.

I wish you was here. Jayne's more surly than usual without you. He misses you awful, like all of us, but don't express it. He's just afraid of lookin' soft. 'Nara's had some great romances, though one got the Captain into the duel, like I said before. He got stabbed! It was awful! He won the duel though. 'Nara says it was dumb luck, but I say the Captain's a lot craftier than she gives 'im credit for. Thanks for warning about the chocolate frogs! They was all sorts a delicious, but the hopping in your insides takes getting used to! Will you send more in your next package?

Hedwig's got a preference for mouse-flavored owl treats. She won't touch the other kinds, picky! It's good you got yourself plenty of friends, but try to make more of 'em, dong ma? Ain't nobody as bad as they seem. I'll put together a banner for your big game! Hope ta see you soon!

Love,

_Kaylee_

"_Wash and Zoe's Letter"_

Hey kiddo! How's flying a broomstick?

**Dear…**

What?

**Ask about him first, then the broomstick.**

He knows we care about him and all that other junk. I want to get to the good part!

**Husband…**

Oh, allright, allright. We're doing fine here. The Captain nearly got us all killed a couple times in the last few months (I think he's slipping, considering how many times we nearly got killed in the past-)

**Wash, if you're not gonna take this seriously…**

Sorry, lamby-toes. Anyway, _Serenity's_ s ship shape and flying perfectly. Well, not exactly completely ship shape… Missing a few parts here and there…

**Wash!**

Zoe!

**Nevermind his blather, Harry. We're doing fine, still flying. Husband just enjoys his griping.**

I do not!

**Anyway, we'll be on Triumph for the next day or so. After that, we'll head for Beaumonte, and then we'll be there for your first game. Now, remember: The rules say no guns. **

Like Harry's going to bring a gun to his first game.

**Remember who taught him how to shoot?**

You did… You don't bring guns to hoopball!

**That's because you never looked closely enough.**

I have got to train my mind to focus on less appealing things.

**Wash…**

What? What? I'm kidding! (sigh) Anyway, Harry, keep your nose out of trouble until we get there. Jayne wasn't sending a letter, but the large package with rattling sounds coming from it seems like a pretty good indication of what he thinks about your ammo reserves.

**Be safe, we can't wait to see you in action.**

And try to break someone's balls with their broom again. That mental image is just too funny to not make real.

**Take care, honey. We love you.**

What she said!

_65 more to go…_

_Next chapter will feature a Firefly Christmas, in honor of the season! Harry gets to show off _Serenity_ to his friends, Dumbedore and Mal have words about the troll incident, and River runs amok in Hogwarts!_

_As always, review so I know what I'm doing wrong! As well as doing right!_


	8. Chapter 8

"_Serenity"_

The loud roar of the ship's engines broke the snow-covered silence of the school courtyard. Dozens of students ran screaming, as _Serenity_ came to a nearly-silent stop, unfortunately crushing a stone bench under it's landing gear. By the time the first teachers had arrived on the scene, Mal was leading a heavily armed Zoe and Jayne out onto the snow. He coldly surveyed the whispering crowd of wizards and witches, before he abruptly grinned.

"Harry!" Harry grimaced, but managed to hide his embarrassment at his family's entrance as he walked out and waved.

"Hey all."

"_HARRY!"_ Kaylee squealed, practically knocking Harry over as she glomped him. Zoe hid a smile while Wash just laughed.

"Excuse me, sir, but-" Mal turned to Professor McGonnagal, looking rather furious at _Serenity _and her crew for their entrance. Mal smiled in his charming, smuggler-like way.

"Not to worry, ma'am. Sorry about the commotion, but we couldn't lock onto a landing beacon, so we had to come in visually."

"That doesn't explain _why_ you decided to _crash_ into my school!" McGonnagal protested. Mal nodded.

"Right. Well, we're here to discuss some things with the headmaster, if you don't mind. Scuse me," Mal stated, brushing past the assistant headmistress, who glared at the back of his head. Harry, quickly apologizing to her for his captain's behavior, raced after Mal as he stalked through the corridors of Hogwarts, ignoring the gawps and whispers that followed him.

"Captain! Captain!"

"Harry, seems there are a few things you didn't let us know in your letter," Mal said flatly. "Luckily the Grangers sent us a wave." Harry gulped.

"I… I didn't want you to worry."

"Harry, let me decide what to worry about, and what not to. Ah, this is the place?" Harry blinked and looked at the imposing gargoyle staring them down. Assorted teachers and students, despite Professor Mcgonnagal's shouts, followed and stared after the odd pair. Mal turned to Jayne, and gestured to the gargoyle. Jayne grinned.

"No grenades," Mal ordered. Jayne blinked and groaned.

"Wha? No grenades?"

"You've got those armor-piercing implosion rounds, right? Shatters stone like a rock shatters glass. Not a good way for a statue to end it's days." Mal turned back… Only to find that the gargoyle had wisely moved aside for Mal to pass through. The captain nodded.

"Smart… Whatever you are."

"_Meeting"_

"Really Dumbledore, you can't be serious. Allowing Harry's guardians to visit the school?" Cornelius Fudge shook his head, gripping his bowler hat ever more tightly. Dumbledore, on the other side of the desk, shook his head with his ever-present twinkle.

"They have as much right to do so as any other parent of children enrolled in this school."

"But Dumbledore, their record! Their ship! They're criminals and Muggles to boot!" Fudge squawked. "Continuing to appease the Pro-Muggle elements in the Ministry is only going to backfire on us! How long until we're revealed once more to the Muggles, hm? In this day and age, their techrology is nearly comparable to our most advanced magic!"

"Technology, I believe, is the correct term, Cornelius," Dumbledore stated. "However, you are quite right. The Muggle world is not ready to make first contact with us. Official first contact, at any rate. However, I feel that allowing Captain Reynolds and his crew access to our school is better for everyone in the long run. They love Harry, like their own son, and will do anything to keep him safe."

The doors to Dumbledore's office were kicked in with a bang, making Fudge jump and fall out of his chair. He turned and looked up with a gape as Malcom Reynolds, his guns out and aimed right for his and Dumbledore's heads, strode in, followed by two crewmembers carrying larger, far more destructive-looking guns and weaponry. Dumbledore, rather than wet the floor (as Fudge was working on at the moment) smiled cheerfully.

"Captain Reynolds! Mr. Cobb, Ms. Washburne! To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Do the words 'cave troll loose in the school' mean anything to you?" Mal asked acidly.

"_Yuletide"_

"_Jing tsai…_ this ship is great!" Ron enthused. Harry held his head and suppressed a groan. His friend's never-ending enthusiasm for anything Muggle wore thin on him every now and again. Ron was at the moment poking an ornament on _Serenity's_ paper and wire Christmas tree, sitting in the center of the dinner table. Hermione, nearby on a couch, was having a spirited conversation with Kaylee about fusion drives and trigger catalysts, while Zoe and Wash sat together on another piece of furniture, watching in some bemusement. Shepherd Book, Jayne and Inara were working on the Christmas dinner they shared yearly on _Serenity,_ while Simon tried to keep River from getting into the knife cabinet.

"River, no! That is NOT a good thing!"

"Pointy… Star edge. Shines and polarizes," she mumbled back, skipping away in her eerie grace. She stopped by Harry and stared at him. He gulped uncomfortably.

"Rip in your life… Took away your bed," she whispered, running a finger down his scar. Harry froze, utterly bewildered. River smiled at him, before turning to Ron, still at the tree.

"Hey, Shepherd? Why won't the ornaments, you know, sing?"

"Because they weren't treated with that particular charm," Book replied with a smile, chopping up some vegetables Dumbledore had sent them. Mal had initially refused the gift, until his own rumbling stomach reminded him that processed protein did not a good Christmas dinner make, so he had gone off to sulk on the bridge.

"Green… It grows and grows, swallowing up everything else. Weed killer, unwilling," River spoke, her eyes still locked on Ron. Harry blinked, and River smiled at him, something she had only done for Simon.

"Deck the halls with _eviscera,_ fa la la la la, la la la la," she sang as she danced away, leaving a confused Harry. Jayne snorted.

"Crazy girl… Can't even sing gorram carols right."

"She was never much of a Christmas fan," Simon sighed, settling into the seat next to Kaylee, who was still happily chatting away with Hermione.

"No no no, the H2 conversion rate is _much_ high with-Look, let me talk you through the calcs, Hermy, ain't gonna learn you any other-"

"Oh ha, like your scribbles will tell me anything," Hermione snorted. "The electrolyzer initial charge _must_ be the conversion rate squared for you to make any fuel at a decent rate of time!"

"All that does is burn up your energy reserves faster! Where did you learn this _fei hua?"_

"My mother!"

"Well sorry, but it ain't so. She probably read out of one of them 'Reactors for Dummies' files they got scattered all over the CoreText." Hermione fumed, while Kaylee turned to smiling at Simon, who blinked and looked up. He then glared.

"River!" She giggled, waving the mistletoe about, as Kaylee gave Simon a kiss that turned him bright red. Wash and Zoe burst out laughing, as did Hermione, as Harry shook his head with a small smile of his own.

"Gorramit boy, watch it!" Harry ducked as Jayne swung a large plate of steaming hot rolls over the table. The mercenary shook his head at the young wizard, who smiled back.

"Merry Christmas, Jayne." Jayne snorted, but he did give Harry a small smile before turning back to the galley set.

"_Manly"_

"Hogwash." Severus Snape blinked, before looking up from his potions laboratory in his study. He scowled.

"How in Merlin's name did you get in here?"

"Merlin's name is not a key, but a charm," River replied enigmatically, before spinning and dancing back into the shadows. Snape rose, drew his wand, and cast a Stunning Charm into the dark corner. It lit up the room in scarlet light, but revealed nothing, just before it impacted the stone wall and burst into sparks. Snape's scowl grew deeper.

"What the _guay…?_"

"Boo," whispered River right in his ear, causing Snape to scream and spin about, falling flat on his arse and knock over his chair. He groaned, as he heard the door to his chambers open and the rush of feet.

"Professor! Professor! Are you allright?" Squawked Draco Malfoy, ever the suck-up, Snape noted. Ever since those damned Muggles had landed, the blond Malfoy heir had been clinging to his robe tail even closer than usual.

"I'm quite allright, thank you," he said gruffly, getting to his feet with as much tattered dignity at he could.

"But you screamed," Goyle insisted. Malfoy elbowed him.

"_No Goyle,_ we heard his, uh… _manly_ call for assistance." Snape stuffed the urge to hit his head against the table, while the unseen girl giggled somewhere in the dark, before vanishing like a wisp of smoke.

_61 more to go…_

_Finally, some responses to the challenge! I eagerly await your results, my fine fellow authors! And not to fret: With the holidays over, I should be able to upload a bit more frequently, in between my schoolwork. _Ciao!


	9. Chapter 9

"_Aftermath"_

This year had been, completely, _da-shiong bao-jah-shr duh la doo-tz_, thought Mal, as he guided _Serenity_ away from Beaumont, the extensive damage from the landing on Mr. Information's moon completely repaired.

Well, not quite.

The loss of Wash… of the Shepherd… of all the folks killed in the operative's mission. Some of them, Mal reflected, certainly deserved their fates, but plenty hadn't. The people of Haven, never deserving such slaughter, were first on his list.

Grief, to Mal, was damage-But in the war, and on _Serenity,_ even damaged equipment was workable, so they put it to use. If it could go one more mile, shoot one more clip, fly one more trip, they made it do so. If they had to grind it into dust to get the job done, they did so. But every bullet, every gouge, every broken bone and every concussion left their mark, slowed you down by so small a degree you didn't notice, until enough had piled up.

"Don't let it drag you down," River spoke into his thoughts. He turned his head and looked over at the girl, sitting in the co-pilot's seat. "_Serenity_ doesn't."

"Well, it shouldn't, since we're in space little albatross," Mal replied quietly, once more looking out into the black ahead. River smiled sadly.

"She grieves; for all that she has lost. Like we do. Only… different. Response times, thruster burns… All a bit off. She doesn't slow down, she just wobbles."

"Wobbles?"

"Wobbles," River confirmed. She ran a pale, graceful hand down the control panel before her. "It's her tears. But she knows she has someone waiting for her. She knows she is loved. And so she continues on."

Mal took in a deep breath, and sighed. His eyes closed, as he sought some kind of center.

"I'm just… So tired. And without the… The others… We ain't got nothing to work within. Chances are work'll be scarce for us anyway, after the wave."

"_Serenity_ wants to fly… But she also feels tired. Weary. She needs time to heal. To grow and reach up once more." River turned to Mal, looking intent. "She needs her last family member to do it." Mal stared back at River, before turning to the navigational screen. He inputted the automatic course, and nodded to himself when Hogwart's Moon, still bearing an "UNINHABITED" marker, appeared.

_Just like Miranda…_

"Not Miranda. Life," River murmured, almost inaudibly. Mal nodded with a small smile.

"Life," he returned, as _Serenity_ leapt ahead, eager to reclaim her last son.

"_Embrace"_

Harry walked, wearily, down the grand steps to the school's Great Hall. The sting in his arm from the basilisk had vanished, but even healed by phoenix tears the wound still felt numb and tingly.

"Harry?" He paused, and looked up from the ground. Hermione stood, looking a bit apprehensive. He smiled at her.

"Feeling better?" He asked. She'd been cured of her petrification only yesterday, along with Colin Creevy, Penelope Clearwater, and Justin Finch-Fletchley. Hermione frowned.

"Of course… But what's got you so down?" Harry blinked at her.

"Excuse me?"

"You've been acting like you've been expelled," Hermione explained. Harry worked his jaw and looked away.

"… I got a wave. It's… A long story. Short version is, well… Wash and Shepherd Book are dead." Harry took a deep breath. Hermione walked closer to him.

"Oh, Harry…" She tentatively hugged him, and while he stiffened at the contact initially, he returned it. He sighed thickly.

"I saved Ginny… And the other Mugglebornes… All here. But my family, the people who love me and trust me the most… I couldn't… I just…" Harry wrenched his face, trying to resist the tears. Hermione held him even closer.

"Harry… Harry, it's allright. Let it out, it's only going to hurt worse if you hold it in," she murmured. Harry snorted, still trying to hold it in… Before finally succumbing and crying messily into Hermione's shoulder. She continued to hold him tightly, rocking back and forth gently. And it was just those two, in the main hall…

Until dinner rolled around, five minutes later.

"Woah! Hermione Granger is making out with Harry Potter!"

"WHAT!"

"Let me see!"

"Ooh, neat!"

"Romance!"

"GAH!" Hermione and Harry broke apart from their perfectly innocent embrace, only to meet the excited questioning and heckling by the crowd.

"Remind me to bring handkerchiefs next time," Harry muttered awkwardly.

"_Moving Day"_

_Serenity_ had landed near Hogsmeade before. It had been when the crew had come down to see Harry's Quidditch games, so the villagers paid them little mind. The mule, loaded up and zipping along at full speed towards the castle, _that_ was new.

"Gorramit girl slow down!" Jayne squawked. River laughed, finding joy in the hover craft's acceleration and freedom. Next to her, Mal was caught between amusement and fear himself. The Mule whipped around a sharp corner, before racing up the path to the castle. River, seeing the train station, hopped the mule over a series of boulders, right up to the train platform, scattering dozens of screaming students.

"Am I going to have to get used to that?" Harry yelled out, grinning. He rushed up to the Mule and climbed aboard, hugging Mal and River at the same time, while Jayne shook his head muttering something vulgar in Mandarin. Mal couldn't help but grin, and hugged the boy back.

"So, what are you all doing here?" Harry asked, sitting on the "hood" of the Mule. Mal shrugged.

"Well, considering just how… Hectic, things are right now, we were thinkin' of taking, ya know… A little vacation. What do you say to sitting around here for the summer?" Harry grinned, before hugging Mal again.

"_Jing tsai!_ That's great!" Harry then frowned, and leaned back once more.

"But… What about payment?" Mal smiled in a slightly devious manner.

"Oh, we'll conjure something up…"

"_Living"_

"THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS!" Roared Cornelius Fudge, red-faced in fury. Dumbledore sat calmly behind his desk, twinkling as brightly as usual.

"I do wish you'd keep your voice down, Cornelius."

"I BLOODY WELL DON'T HAVE TO! This is going TOO FAR, Albus! Too far indeed! HIRING the crew of that-that _gose_ hunk! For what, praytell!"

"With the recent increases in Deatheater sightings, and Reaver attacks, I felt it only prudent to begin some investigations," Dumbledore replied pleasantly. "I have been requesting a ship from the ministry for quite some time."

"YES, but YOU do not have the authority to-to-to start your own fleet!" Fudge spat. Dumbledore raised his eyebrows.

"My own fleet? Really, Cornelius; _Serenity_ is of no threat to anyone. She is not even armed. And Captain Reynolds and his crew have no interest in military action, or combat of any kind. They are merely couriers. And I assure you, all information we glean on the Deatheaters will be forwarded to your departments. Nothing held back, you have my wizard's oath on that." Fudge took deep breaths, clutching his bowler hat in his attempt to calm down. He nodded, his teeth still set on edge slightly.

"Very… Very _well_, Albus. I know better than to question your oath. You just… you do realize the difficult position I am in, correct? The recent chaos in the Muggle Alliance has seriously altered our working structure. Their entire government is undergoing a complete turnover and reconstruction-And _Serenity_ is apparently the cause! I have no wish to see our own Ministry fall apart as well!"

"It won't fall apart, unless there is something you would prefer not get out into the public?" Dumbledore asked politely. "I sincerely doubt that the Ministry is involved in any sort of illegal operations such as the Alliance was. Operations that might lead to it's downfall. As long as this is the case, there is no fear of _Serenity_ getting involved," Dumbledore spoke, calmly, reassuringly, but with a glint of warning. Fudge gulped, and nodded, replacing his hat.

"Of… Of course, Albus. Thank you for meeting me. Well… I'll be off now." And with that, Fudge turned and walked, stiffly, out the double doors. Dumbledore leaned back in his chair, thoughtful.

"The Alliance and the Ministry were both involved with River Tam. Of that, I am sure," a cultured, masculine voice spoke into the stillness of the office. Dumbledore nodded.

"Tom's movements before his downfall clearly indicated something was going on… What, precisely, is unknown." Dumbledore turned, and faced his shadowy guest in the corner of his office.

"Captain Reynolds will not like your… Presence, on these errands he will be sent upon, but he will need you," Dumbledore continued. The man nodded.

"Miranda, alas, was only one piece, of a much larger puzzle. The entire picture is incomplete. The main image is not even hinted at. But, slowly, I have been able to find and push a few pieces into the right places."

"Harry Potter, for instance," the man surmised. Dumbledore nodded.

"Indeed. Ronald Weasley, Draco Malfoy, Dobby-These pieces moved, or were moved, to the right places, at the right times. _Serenity_ was not moved by my hand, but in hindsight their involvement was for the better. Harry is now a soldier."

"But taught by a soldier using… Independence training. More accurately, a training that reflects late 20th century and early 21st century Earth-That-Was Western training," the man interjected. "Training that gave Malcolm Reynolds the edge he needed to win, to survive-To think and fight for himself. A dangerous ideology."

"In one sense, yes. I had originally intended for Harry to rely on me after coming to Hogwarts. I was to be his one, true anchor, to guide him and train him into the fight ahead," Dumbledore shook his head with a sad smile. "He does not trust me. Not completely, anyway. And I suppose it is difficult to blame him for that."

"You have not lied to him, nor forced him into anything," the man spoke. Dumbledore sighed.

"No, but I moved the pieces. The board was set for him. Only, he is not a pawn, but a knight. Less predictable."

"Much like Captain Reynolds," the man concluded. Dumbledore nodded.

"In the end, Harry is the only one. But _Serenity_ is the key." Dumbledore turned to the man.

"The key cannot afford to be harmed, any more than it has. The family needs to stay together. Harry, needs them, to fulfill his destiny."

"But what if he turns away from his destiny?" The man asked, adjusting his spectacles. Dumbledore smiled wanly.

"Even I cannot know what that will mean…"

_Dun du, dun dun da dunnnnn!_

_57 more to go… Stay tuned!_


	10. Chapter 10

_"Trauma"_

Mal leaned back, yawning hugely, as he stretched out in his chair. The summer sun danced through the shadows of the tree he relaxed under, a slight breeze waving the foliage above. He took a sip of his beer, and yawned again.

"Captain Reynolds?" Mal looked up under lazy eyelids. He nodded to the speaker, the wizened-looking Dumbeldore.

"Bumblebee! What can I do for you?" He asked, not bothering to get up. The headmaster twinkled slightly with a small chuckle.

"I had heard that you knew some Latin, Captain." Mal shrugged slightly.

"My mama taught me. Figured it would be somethin' to brag about someday."

"So you can understand it?" The captain nodded, pulling a pair of

sunglasses that had migrated down below his nose back over his eyes.

"Most part. Just seems to stick with you." The aging headmaster walked over, and produced a scroll. He handed it to Mal, who opened it carelessly and skimmed through.

"This manuscript appears to be written in a dialect of that language. A

very obscure one, as a matter of fact. My expertise, alas, does not extend to ancient languages quite so far as in other fields." Mal squinted.

"... Symbols seem a mite diff'rent. Still looks like basic form though. Why would you have any trouble with it?" Dumbledore smiled self-deprecatingly.

"As I said, it is not my expertise. We speak spells in Latin, of course, but they have lost their context with the original language. Such things happen over several centuries, naturally."

"Albus... We've been sitting here on our _pee gous _for nigh over a month. Your hospitality is appreciated, but men like me don't fancy a life of handout and paperwork. This have to do with our next job?" Mal asked critically. Dumbledore nodded.

"It does." Mal's eyes narrowed.

"Your assasin coming along too?" Dumbledore shook his head.

"He has suffered as much tragedy as you in his own life. Of a different nature, but no less painful." Mal held Dumbledore's gaze. Secretly, the headmaster was impressed by the sheer tenacity Captain Reynolds possessed. And also, by his recklessness in the pursuit of

saving his family or doing the right thing-Admittedly, seldom doing both at the same time, but still.

"He ain't suffered near enough," Mal intoned coldly. "Not for what he's done." Dumbledore nodded.

"Perhaps... However, he is needed on these missions. He saved your life I do believe, last time?" Mal grit his teeth and resisted the urge to pull his gun on the old wizard. He clenched his right hand and tried to not imagine how it would feel to choke the life out of this manipulative, insensitive old _hwoon dahn_.

"It will not happen again," he hissed. "Now, got job for us or not?"

Dumbledore's twinkling paused, before resuming as he handed over a second set of scrolls. He turned away to walk back to the castle, the tall gray towers framed by blue sky.

"The parchment contains all the relevant information. If you have any questions, feel free to ask." Mal got up and turned away, walking back towards Serenity, sitting near Hagrid's hut on the main school grounds. Dumbledore followed the captain's progress for a moment, before turning and resuming his lonely trek to Hogwarts.

"_Plotting"_

"From what we can deduce, its part of a religious temple-type structure found on Osiris," River spoke clearly and calmly to the rest of the crew seated around the table that night. Inara looked over at Mal, seemingly for permission, before she added:

"It was uncovered, buried under several tons of dirt near the site of the first colony," the Companion stated. Mal frowned.

"So, what-Did aliens build it?" Jayne asked, stupefied. River shrugged.

"Unknown. It is made of a material unlike any previously catalogued. It has many similarities to francium and other, high-density elements, but remains stable. It also appears to share many qualities with a superconductor."

"Super-what?" Asked Jayne. Kaylee stepped in.

"It's something that channels and enhances the energy of an electrical current, thanks to… Uh… What's it called again?"

"The Meissner effect," River explained. "This element has revolutionized our understanding of physics, and could have numerous applications."

"Such as?" Mal asked. River looked at him flatly.

"Experiments reveal that the material can be converted to a more unstable form… Which can enhance the energy output of virtually anything. Reactors, engines, sensors-"

"Weapons?" Jayne asked, understanding that part at least after 'enhances'. River nodded.

"By at least one hundred times. Anyone with possession of this technology would be assured dominance in any future contest, whether it be economics or warfare."

"Then we can't let the Alliance figure out how to use it," Mal said practically. "They're already on the ropes-Revolution's brewing. Something like this could keep them in power and hurt a lot of folks."

"Voldemort would want it, too," Harry said quietly. Zoe nodded grimly.

"What's the plan, sir?" Mal pointed down at a map provided by Dumbledore, of the facility they'd been tasked with infiltrating.

"We'll use the invisibility cloaks to sneak in, here, here, and here. It'll be myself, Zoe, Jayne, and River. Kaylee, you'll monitor activity in the surrounding area. Inara, you and Simon keep ready in case things go south. And Harry? Be ready to fly in so that we can put the thing in the harness and reel it in. In and out in thirty minutes, tops." Mal frowned.

"The operative'll be with us again this time. I don't have to tell you what that means."

"Keep our other eyes on him," River suggested. Everyone gave her a blank look. She taped the back of her head.

"Eyes. Back of head."

_55 more to go…_

_Sorry for the short update. Longer one up next! Stay tuned!_


	11. Chapter 11

"_Back in the Saddle"_

Thomas Peterson had gotten into the Alliance military primarily to pay for dental school. A simple job as an MP, on a quiet research base on Osirus… No fuss, no danger, no excitement. And the training sure had kept him in shape.

But now, after getting the _gose_ kicked out of him without anyone in sight, as he lay semi-conscious on the hard, cold floor, he began to reconsider his future with the military.

"Guard's down, sir," Zoe whispered, sneaking behind her captain as they looked around a corner of the facility. They may have been invisible thanks to the cloaks, but old habits died hard.

"Hide him?" Mal asked, stealthily creeping down the now-empty hallway. Zoe nodded.

"Broom closet."

"Don't you just love those?" The captain asked with a slight smile. His first mate rolled her eyes, as the two came up to a large, steel vault door. There were no humans guards on this level-Except for the one, who kept an eye on the hovering, laser-armed defensive drones buzzing above them like white, fat bees. The drones were unable to detect them through the invisibility cloaks, but Mal was not so confident in magic as to take any chances.

One of the drones was abruptly shoved into by another. The victim drone's AI construed the impact as a miscalculation on the part of the offending robot, and sent a request for the attacker's AI to undergo a full diagnostic-In other words, a complaint. The drone that had hit the complaining drone logged it's own report, complaining that the other drone had not been watching where it was going. And the rest of the swarm began updating the main server with their own reports, resulting what amounted to an electronic pileup.

Mal grinned underneath the cloak, as he stealthily pressed a hack-chip into the vault's lock. The drones, too preoccupied with the incident that did not compute, failed to notice the vault open and close all on it's own. The main server processing their information was beleaguered by the robot's frantic requests for data on the collision. Being very simple AIs, with simple jobs, all this humbug was not entirely unexpected.

Which is what Mal and Zoe had counted on in the first place.

Coming to an airlock, Mal input an access code. The steel airlock opened, finally letting the two brigands into a much larger, dull white room that just screamed Alliance architecture. It also screamed "Alliance Lab", due to the fact that it contained something that certainly did not belong amid the sterile, eggshell walls.

"Woah… How big do you think it is?" Mal asked Zoe, as he stepped lightly to the large, stone ring supported in the center of the cavernous room. His first mate hummed thoughtfully.

"About six meters across… Headmaster said it weighed over sixty tons." Mal shook his head, laying an invisible hand on the smooth, inner ring covered in strange, arcane symbols.

"That much? Can't be… Looks like synth material. Plastic." Mal rapped his knuckles on the ring, and winced.

"Definitely ain't plastic," he muttered, rubbing his aching knuckles. "Zoe, how we set for time?"

At Zoe's silence, Mal turned around. The invisibility cloak had been charmed so that you could see others wearing cloaks, which allowed the captain to see Zoe looking up, blankly. Mal followed her gaze.

"… Woah." _Serenity_ hovered above them, silently, even though her thrusters were burning at full to keep her completely stationary over the huge ring. Mal's radio crackled.

"Uh… Yeah?"

"_Hey Captain… We took one of the service shafts down. This whole facility used to be a mine, with ships coming to and fro, in and out. Wasn't too hard to maneuver through," _Kaylee stated brightly. "_Jayne's ready with the winch when you are!"_

"Huh… This may actually work," Mal noted with a smile.

Ten minutes, and a snapped winch assembly later, Mal was no longer smiling.

"Little Kaylee… You _told_ me that we could lift it with our winch," Mal growled through the radio. "That ain't lifting." The winch cable hung, shredded, from the belly of the charmed _Serenity._

"_Well, how was I supposed to know the weight limit was _exactly _60 tons?"_ The mechanic complained. "_That little control console's to blame! You didn't say we were bringing that along!"_

The little control console came up to Mal's sternum, resembling a stone mushroom with dozens of symbols covering it like the inner ring of the artifact. And in the center of it was a large, spherical jewel.

"… Will the whole thing fit through our cargo hatch?" Mal asked. There was a moment of silence.

"_I could charm the Ring to float… Then we could maneuver it into the ship,"_ Harry spoke thoughtfully. Mal nodded.

"Allright, land and let's get to it."

"_Complications"_

"Grrrr… You were s'posed to… make it light!" Jayne gasped, struggling with the rest of the crew to push the massive ring into _Serenity's_ cargo hold. It hung suspended a few feet off the ground, at the perfect height for pushing. However, that did not change the fact that there was considerable reluctance on the part of the ring to go anywhere, even with all of Jayne's strength behind it.

"I made it _float…_ It's still got its mass," Harry groused, pushing ineffectually against the ring alongside Kaylee and Mal. "This just gets it off the ground!"

"Gorramit, kid! You're s'posed ta make it so's we can move it!" Jayne snarled, his face red from the exertion. Inara groaned, Mal sucked in a deep breath, Zoe grimaced, Simon panted, Kaylee squeaked, Harry shook his head, and River, contentedly, leaned against the huge ring.

The entire crew came together, all looking out of sorts (aside from River), in a circle near the ring.

"Allright… Hook up the mule… We can tow it in, cause' this certainly ain't doin' nothing," Mal panted. He shook his head and took a deep, rasping breath.

"If I may?" Mal, Zoe, Jayne, and Harry all had their guns out and pointed at the head of the speaker in an instant. The operative blinked, looking rather amused.

"Where the _hell_ have _you been?"_ Mal snarled breathlessly. The operative shrugged.

"The Headmaster had me otherwise engaged. If I may?" He repeated. With a slightly less murderous look from Mal as an affirmative, the operative walked over to the massive ring. Looking it over, he went to the small console that came with it, and pushed a few buttons. A burst of light emerged from the side of the ring, followed by a few more, which slowly but surely steered the massive artifact into the _Serenity's_ open cargo hold. The operative then simply pushed the console along, nestling it alongside the larger ring. He turned and saw the entire crew staring at him.

"The artifact apparently has a means of maneuvering… Potentially, for placement in space," the operative explained. Kaylee groaned.

"Why didn't I think a' that?" Mal merely contented himself with muttering violent oaths under his breath as he stalked past the operative. The rest of the crew followed him, as the cargo hatch closed soundlessly behind them.

"A Silencing Charm? Well done, Mr. Potter, well done indeed…"

"_BEE-tzway!"_

_53 more to go… Hang on!_


	12. Chapter 12

"_Mentors"_

Inara lunged with her blade, thrusting hard, as Harry parried it away and darted to the left. He swung the blade for the Companion's exposed side, but she easily dodged and brought her sword back on the young boy. He blocked the strike, moving backwards, before diving into a forward somersault underneath Inara's next swing. He was back on his feet in an instant, thrusting the blade forward, which Inara easily parried and brought her hands to the hilt of Harry's sword, disarming him with a single step. Harry dove again, rolling away as Inara stabbed where he had been moments before with both blades. The Companion brought both swords up to Harry's chest, as he stood back up. The boy wizard looked down and grimaced.

"Gorramit…" Inara smiled slightly.

"You did much better this time… Just try to keep me from getting close enough to take your sword this time," she consoled, tossing Harry his sword again. The thirteen-year old wizard sighed heavily, before assuming a battle stance again. Inara nodded, and he struck with three quick attacks, driving the Companion back to the wall of the courtyard. She ducked his next attack and tried to come up inside his defense, which he'd been expecting and so brought his sword to counter. The clang of the blades followed a thud and an "OOF!" as Harry fell on his back. Inara held her sword to his chest once more.

"Harry, even foolish-looking attacks can defeat you," she advised. "In a real fight, you can't count on anything."

"In a real fight, he'd have already shot you by now," Mal's voice floated over the courtyard. Inara glared at him as she pulled Harry to his feet. Captain Reynolds walked forward, hands in the pockets of his pants.

"Harry might not always have the _luxury_ of possessing his wand or a gun," the Companion countered. "He needs to know how to fight with whatever he has."

"And he shouldn't waste his time in fighting in ways he's never gonna have to!" Mal argued, shaking his head. "River's done taught him plenty of _real _fightin'."

"This from the man who had to fight a duel with swords? Guess you didn't need any instruction before that fight, now did you?" Inara hissed. Mal grit his teeth audibly, before he took Harry by the shoulder and pulled him towards the entrance of the courtyard.

"I don't have to explain myself to nobody. Don't you have clients to tend to anyhows?" He shot back as he left Inara standing with both swords in her hands. A loud curse in Mandarin followed them, as did the sound of a blade imbedding itself in a stone wall. Harry looked up at Mal and opened his mouth.

"Not now," the captain growled. "You've got some real studying to do anyhow."

"_Romance, Part One"_

"I mean, they're been at eachother's throats for weeks now!" Harry shook his head, notebooks and textbooks out on _Serenity's_ galley table. Across from him sat Ron and Hermione. The bushy-haired girl had about a dozen heavy-looking textbooks obscuring her face, while Ron had a couple _Marvin the Mad Muggle_ comic books out before him. Ron shrugged.

"Maybe it's over the last heist? She didn't get a real cut from it…" Hermione sighed and rolled her eyes.

"Ron, that's not it. Inara's not even part of the gang-She just helps sometimes." Hermione peeked over her stack of books at Harry. "They've been dancing around eachother for years, right?" Harry nodded.

"Yeah… Kaylee says that they've never been able to, ya know… Express their feelings. Captain thinks it'd be pointless, since Inara will never… You know…"

"Quit being a Companion, right?" Ron asked. Hermione nodded.

"Of course. They probably, well… Tried something romantic, after the heist… But it came apart." Ron looked confused.

"Romantic? Like what?" Hermione opened her mouth… Before closing it, and blushing a little. Harry coughed and looked down at his notes. Ron frowned.

"Hey! C'mon, I don't get it. What kind of romantic?"

"Well, what do your parents do when they want to be… You know… Alone?" Hermione asked, raising her eyebrows. Ron blinked.

"Er… Haven't a clue. They always leave house and have the twins babysit." Ron shuddered. "_Kwong-juh duh, _my parents, leaving me and Ginny with those two."

Hermione and Harry exchanged a look that said _Let's not get into this with him until he's older,_ before going back to their studies. Ron went back to his comic books, but still frowned in slight confusion at what his friends had been referring to.

_I'll have to ask mum and dad…_

"_Romance, Part 2"_

Hermione sighed and rubbed some lotion into her tanned skin. Her month on Sihon before coming to visit Harry at Hogwarts had been fun, but she was peeling a bit still from the extra sun she'd gotten. It was primarily a resort world, what with the Companion Academy based there.

A knock at her door caught her attention, and she went over and opened it. River walked in, holding her blanket and a pillow.

"Simon and Kaylee," she said by way of explanation. Hermione flushed, understanding completely, and nodded to the other bed in the guest room. River took it without another word, as Hermione shut the door and went back to her own bed.

"Hermione?" The Dalton Colony girl sighed and got up again, opening the door for a frightened-looking Harry. She blinked.

"Harry?"

"Zoe and the others all took the other guest rooms, and, well… Simon and Kaylee, er…" Harry saw River, and coughed. "I can sleep on the floor." Hermione shook her head with a small smile.

"I'll sleep with River. You can take my bed, Harry." Harry nodded, grinning at her.

"Thanks Hermione. I owe you one," he said, as he walked over and pulled the sheets over his body. Hermione closed the door again, and walked over to River's bed… Only to see that she was no longer there. Hermione blinked.

"River?" Harry looked up from the other bed.

"She gone?" Hermione nodded. Harry shrugged.

"She does that sometimes… She won't mind." Hermione nodded to Harry, before slipping into River's bed and sighing contentedly. Unbeknownst to them both, the girl in question was still watching. River giggled.

"_Romance, Part 3"_

Ron yawned hugely, and scratched the back of his head. He tumbled out of his bunk and rubbed his eyes clean of sleep, before padding out of his guest room and down the corridor. He blinked curiously at Hermione's partially opened door, and went to investigate.

"Hermione, are you…" He stopped abruptly and gasped. Harry, blinking sleepily, pulled his glasses on and saw Ron's shocked-looking face.

"Ron? What is it?" Ron squeaked something, his face turning bright red, before he turned, slamming the door. Something sighed next to Harry, and he froze.

"… Harry? What are you doing in my bed?" Hermione asked, sounding confused.

"GAH!" Bellowed Mal down the hallway. Forgetting their awkward situation immediately, Harry and Hermione tumbled out of bed and down the hallway. Jayne, already cocking Vera, and Zoe, already loading her pistol, took up positions outside the room Mal's scream had come from. The Captain himself finally emerged from the room, wrapping a sheet haphazardly around his naked form with a wide-eyed look to his face.

"… Sir?" Zoe asked blankly, with an undercurrent of laughter threatening to bubble up into her voice. Jayne raised an eyebrow, as Harry gaped and Hermione turned away, blushing. Mal shook his head with a grimace.

"DOCTOR!" Simon appeared next, without a shirt and looking suspiciously refreshed. He looked at Mal questioningly.

"Captain?" Mal held up his covering blanket with one hand, and pointed back into the guest room with the other.

"_Gwai-gwai long duh dong_ is your _sister doing_ in _my bed,_ naked!" At this, River emerged, wearing little more than a smile. She then frowned at Mal.

"_Shuh muh?_"She asked, in disbelief. Simon, at this moment, decided that now was a very good time to pass out in shock. Jayne grinned at River's display, but only until Zoe thwapped him on the head.

"OW! Gorram woman!"

"Hey, wait a-! RIVER! STOP!" Mal shouted, as River dragged him back into the guest room, shutting it with the lock activating behind it. Hermione and Harry looked at eachother.

"I'll get the mule fired up," Harry said, at the same time Hermione stated, "I'll get some food." They blinked at eachother.

"Wait for us!" Zoe ordered, dragging a cursing Jayne behind by the ear.

* * *

_49 left to go… I wonder how Inara's going to take this change in situation? Not well, I'd imagine. R&R!_


	13. Chapter 13

_Well, back to the daily grind! Mwahahahahaha!

* * *

_

"_Understatement"_

"So, exactly…?" Zoe began, but was quickly silence with a glare from Mal as they both sat in _Serenity's_ cockpit.

"_Nothing. Happened."_ Mal shook his head, and sighed. "Gorram girl's _still _nuts…"

"Now you know that's not true in the slightest," Zoe admonished, adjusting their course slightly as _Serenity_ approached Hogwart's moon's upper atmosphere. "Maybe nuts about _you,_ but not crazy. Just, you know… Lacking guidance, sir."

"I do suppose the Alliance never bothered to explain the birds and bees to her," Mal mused. Zoe rolled her eyes.

"No, sir… I mean she's probably never had a crush before. She don't know what to do with it. So, she probably looks it up around her." Mal frowned.

"She's a reader, though… Why doesn't she see, that I'm, well…"

"Not interested, sir?" Zoe asked calmly. Mal nodded. Zoe smirked.

"Maybe she _does,_ sir." Mal fairly choked at that.

"She… I… I'm not…!" Mal protested. Zoe grinned.

"Sir. Seriously. I've seen the way you look at her! Hard not to, and given all the time you two have spent together lately…"

"I'm old enough to be her father!" Mal protested. "And Inara's… Well… She… We… Er… _Gose…"_

"River doesn't seem to think so," Zoe said coolly. "And I reckon she's seen into how you and Inara are doin'… Or not doing, as may be the case sir." Mal groaned, and threw his head back, closing his eyes.

"… Same old, sir?" Zoe pressed. Mal sighed.

"We tried… I mean, _really _tried. But then, she's got another client… Emergency call from Sihon, all manner of nonsense. In our date! And she has to drop it! How many jobs have _we_ passed up for her, hm? How many? _Plenty,_ that's how many! And she… She won't… She _can't_ walk away." Mal slapped his hands over his eyes.

"So… You lost your temper, said some thing you didn't mean, and she throws you out, right sir?" Zoe concluded. Mal moaned in the affirmative.

"Figured as much. She getting off on Beaumont, sir?" Mal sighed.

"No. She's coming back… She's just not speakin'."

"Is that unusual?"

"Feels different. The kind of ending, death different," Mal confessed. "River was just… Last bit 'o fuse to be lit." Zoe nodded, and stayed silent. The captain had heard her piece, knew how she thought about the situation. And like any good 2IC, she let him make the final decision. In this, she knew, she couldn't fail.

"_Benched"_

It wasn't so much that they had left him behind, Harry mused, as he sat up on one of the balconies of the castle and looked out over the night lit countryside. Harry understood that there were some missions he wasn't well trained enough for yet. When Zoe, Mal, _and_ Jayne all agreed that a job was too risky for the young wizard, Harry knew better than to question them. They knew what they were talking about.

But leaving with all this awkward mess lying about… It didn't sit well with him. He sighed and shook his head. Bad enough River had tried to seduce the captain… Bad enough she'd put Harry into Hermione's bunk. Ron had taken the whole thing as some sort of betrayal of their friendship, and refused to speak to either of them, going back to the Burrow for the last two weeks of summer vacation. This hurt Harry more than anything else. He cared for Hermione, very much, but he also trusted Inara's insight: At this age, he shouldn't worry about girls. Not yet.

Besides, romance seemed to cause nothing but trouble. In his estimation, he would be better off without it-At least, he considered, until he was old enough to appreciate the good things about it.

Hermione and he had both agreed that the whole thing was no real big deal… At least, that's what he thought. Hermione had looked a little nervous when she said this, but Harry didn't quite know how to quantify it. He guessed she agreed with his assessment, that they both didn't know what romance truly was (emotionally speaking), and it wasn't something to dwell on right now. But she did look a bit… Distant? Disappointed?

Nah, he wouldn't go that far.

Ron, however… Perhaps Ron simply didn't understand. Maybe he thought the two of them were closer than they were to him. Ron was a bit jealous at times, but never like this. Was it because Hermione was a girl? Harry honestly could not detect a real difference. An emotional one, he supposed.

"Gorramit," he muttered under his breath. All this twisting and turning of thoughts in his head wouldn't get him any closer to a solution. And it was well past his usual sleeping time. He scooted himself off the balcony and swung back into his dormitory, bedding down and hoping to fall asleep.

"_Warming"_

Hermione sighed and put her textbook back in its place next to her dormitory bed. Since she was the only one here, she didn't really have to worry about keeping things neat and tidy, but she did out of habit, if nothing else.

"_Bun _Ron," she muttered. That Ron! God, he was such a child! Hadn't he heard about River's antics? What _exactly_ did he think was going on between her and Harry? They were all bloody friends, after all! Friends! They didn't need to quarrel over each other did they?

She entertained the notion that Ron had a crush on her… But shook her head. She doubted it a lot. Why exactly would he be attracted to her?

More likely, she was someone he thought of as a member of his family… And seeing your brother and sister in an "intimate" embrace would probably set anyone off. Poor Ron… It would probably have been about as traumatic as seeing your parents… together.

Hermione shuddered at that mental image, and resolved to go to sleep that moment to hopefully _not_ dream about such things.

"_Snug"_

Ron, not prone to musing about the intricacies of a person's interpersonal relationships, was fast asleep at home. He'd been fuming for a while before he fell asleep, but had the strangest dream about a snake that resembled Harry and a fox resembling Hermione inviting him to raid the local farm. He, being a rabbit, replied happily and came along, eating to his heart's content of the carrots and cabbage in the gardens. Alas, the farmer was alert by a rat (that resembled Scabbers), and came out with a pitchfork, causing the three friends to run. They were protected by a huge black dog and wolf, but only after Harry the snake had done something… Which he missed because he woke up.

Shaking his head at the bizarre dream, Ron decided to head back to Hogwarts and try to mend things between himself, Harry, and Hermione. It wasn't their fault that River was completely mental, right? And he had been a bit of a prat.

Shame this sensitivity he possessed would be trampled over in the years to come by raging hormones and near-death experiences…

* * *

_45 left to go. R&R!_

_And no, I'm not bashing Ron. It's just an observation of how he's been as he's entered his teenaged years. More than likely, he'll grow out of this phase of being a twit (as seen most recently in Book 6) and become sensible once more. It's not Ron-Just puberty._

_But anyway… Dumbledore and the operative discuss recent events next time! Dumbledore fans, beware!_


	14. Chapter 14

_Sorry for the wait! Next chapter will be much longer, I promise!  
_

"_The Game"_

Albus Dumbledore considered the chessboard before him, his long elegant fingers steepled in his thought.

"I must admit, I was surprised to find you with a _Muggle_ chess set," his opponent observed, slightly amused. The headmaster smiled enigmatically, with his usual twinkle.

"It helps to keep one's focus. Not on single battles, but on the whole," Dumbledore surmised, moving a knight to support his bishop in an apparent pincer move on the opponent's queen. His adversary moved in a rook to counter.

"Ah. Not going for the jugular right away, I see," his opponent responded, as Dumbledore once more assumed a thoughtful expression.

"You cannot strike directly at the heart of your enemy without sufficient force," Dumbledore replied, seeing the game beyond the black and white board. "Especially if the spear point is wavering."

"So you know."

"Did you expect otherwise?"

"Not at all. But I do recognize your need for occasional mundane speech," Dumbledore's opponent chuckled, as the headmaster moved a pawn.

"Black." Dumbledore frowned. "Harry's godfather. Reviled and condemned as his parent's murderer."

"A lie, of course," his opponent stated flatly, taking the pawn and threatening Dumbledore's king directly. The aged headmaster sighed heavily, easily conquering the pawn and putting his rook into prime checking position.

"Truth is, I'm afraid, a commodity we cannot afford the public," Dumbledore said at last. "And even if we told them the truth, what of it? Who would believe us? We have no proof."

"Save the culprit lying curled up in a boy's dormitory for three years now," his opponent observed. Dumbledore's twinkle faded slightly, which was enough for his adversary to serve as an answer.

"Dare I ask how you found out?"

"It's better that you don't. My methods are not your concern," his opponent noted. Dumbledore nodded.

"I still can't believe you'd allow this school to harbor such filth," his opponent went on, taking Dumbledore's rook. The headmaster sighed again.

"There are many things this school harbors, old friend. A great deal of things we require."

"Such as the traitor to Riddle," his opponent added. "Does he still enjoy tormenting the Chosen One?"

"I'm afraid that he does. His teaching methods leave… Much to be desired. And yet, they are what I need. What Harry needs," Dumbledore replied.

"So you continue to say."

"His actions are indeed petty, but they too serve a purpose, in the end."

"He has probably destroyed the future careers of dozens of wizards, and continued to keep Slytherin isolated and reviled. He may yet bring this school down upon our ears if his loyalty wavers. Is this part of your purpose as well?"

"It is a risk, and not without its consequences," Dumbledore replied, moving his knight and sitting back. "But without such sacrifices, all our efforts will be lost. Checkmate."

His opponent smiled sadly, and shook his head as he tipped his king over. "I may yet beat you, old friend."

"Perhaps," Dumbledore brought his fingers in front of his face, the twinkle restored as he smiled. "But not today."

_44 left to go._

_Next Time: Sirius Black makes his debut as the _Serenity _crew try their hand at bounty-hunting._


	15. Chapter 15

_Okay, everyone just ignore the last chapter. I finally got my muse back! _

"_Sunny"_

The chill of the dementors was ever present here, it seemed. Mal saw the local people of Azkaban, who lived in the shadow of the vast prison. Their drab black and gray clothing seemed perfectly suited to their lifeless movements, quiet discourse, and cold, stony gazes as he, Jayne, and Zoe passed by.

"Let's get the job and git," Jayne suggested, sweating heavily as his eyes darted about, the atmosphere immediately demanding full, paranoid attention to it's surroundings. Mal set his jaw, as Zoe's face hardened that much more.

"Sunny day out," she noted blandly. Mal looked up and, indeed, the sky was a vibrant blue as the sun shone brightly overhead. Few clouds marred the light. Mal looked back down at the town. He still shivered.

"Not sunny enough, seems…"

"_Names"_

The job Dumbledore had sent them on had been to locate an escaped inmate from the prison. As Mal entered the warden's office, he was in mind to ask what was so important about this particular prisoner. The warden, a hardened man missing an eye next to his hawkish nose, and below his neat, graying, slicked-back hair, nodded to them to take their seats, as he did his own. A crow preened near a stack of documents, the scent of aging paper filling the black room.

"You're here about XY390, right?" He asked in a gravelly tone. Mal nodded.

"Sirius Black, right?" The warden shrugged.

"Names are of little important here," he said simply. A grim smile emerged, one that reminded Mal of the crazed grin a certain Reaver had worn just before slaughtering one of it's victims.

"The dementors see to that."

"_Logic and Emotion"_

_So this was him. The one who did this to you, Harry,_ Zoe thought, looking over the news clippings and files the warden had given them. Just before they'd cleared out of Azkaban at a speed slightly less that of breaking atmo.

He was their best friend, the best man at Harry's parent's wedding. The Secret Keeper. The Betrayer. She felt her hands move for her sawed-off shotgun as rage ignited in her.

She couldn't help feeling that she had failed Wash, her husband, during the crash-landing on Mr. Universe's moon. Logically she knew she couldn't have stopped that harpoon from plunging through his chest… They would both have died. The mission would have failed. Miranda would still be a secret. Logically, she knew that Black wasn't a Reaver.

Emotionally, Zoe Washburne knew that Black would not live much longer. She knew that he would be begging for death after she, the captain, and everyone else on _Serenity_ got through with him. She knew… That Harry's suffering would be avenged. And in some way, so would Wash.

_Kerchack,_ said the shotgun.

"_Insight"_

River hadn't wanted to scan Azkaban. The Dementors felt _cold_, _so cold,_ and yet _hungry, so hungry._ The Reavers were flames, insane rage billowing up in a constantly fueled furnace. The Dementors were empty, for lack of a better term, which was why they were cold and hungry. Hungry for emotion, for flames to overcome this void within them that drove them so.

She noted, with disturbing clarity, that the Reaver could not be consumed by the Dementor. The rage of a Reaver was boundless and constant, as though pumped into the Reavers from the outside. The Dementors were bottomless, and could never be satisfied even if they sucked all the emotion from every human in the system.

_Wouldn't that be a wonderful weapon… A soldier, a killer unaffected by the Dementors because they feel no sorrow, or regret, or happiness? A weapon that only knows rage._

River couldn't prove it. Her evidence was not enough to convince anyone who didn't trust in her powers. But she knew it. Which was, at least, a start.

So she headed for one of the worlds that Black had been sighted on, _something_ pushing her mind to the illogical conclusion that this murderer who had ruined Harry's life was part of the Puzzle. As she deliberated within her mind, Mal sitting nearby in mild discomfort at his denial to his feelings, she offered the captain a smile. He smiled back, unable to fight his relief at the sight, his emotions frayed by Azkaban.

_Don't worry,_ she sent to his mind. _We're on the right path._

His worry about Harry vanished, replaced with the determination she knew so well. She nodded to herself. _He will need it again. We all will._

"_Black"_

Harry paused, and squinted out into the darkness of the Forbidden Forest. Hedwig on his shoulder hooted in warning, drawing back ever so slightly from the woods. Harry frowned.

"You okay girl?" He asked, rubbing her head gently. Hedwig calmed down only a little, her amber eyes still locked onto the darkness. Her eyes met burning blue eyes, feral in their attitude. Hedwig hooted wildly, Harry turning back to the forest.

"… Long night, huh girl?" Harry asked, stroking Hedwig's back comfortingly, as the moon revealed nothing in the trees. Hedwig kept her eyes back though as the boy walked back towards the castle, the owl's gaze trying to find the beast lurking in the brush.

As for the owner of the eyes… A bark that sounded like laughter rang out in the forest, as a dark shape trotted away.

_39 left to go…_

_Yes, I admit it! I can't put this down. So, the show must go on. Look out for more chapters (hopefully) in the near future!_


	16. Chapter 16

_A Christmas Update. W00t!_

_BTW, who the hell invented l33t speaking anyway?_

"_Mistletoe"_

"Captain, look up." Mal blinked at River, who was giving him something of a coy expression. He rubbed the back of his head, sighing in fatigue. They'd returned to Hogwarts, no Sirius Black, and he was feeling very tired.

"Lil' Albatross, I don't think-" Seemingly in exasperation, she closed the distance between them and kissed him. Thoroughly. She pulled back, pleased to see his dumbstruck expression.

"_Guay…"_

The girl giggled, as he finally noticed the mistletoe overhead. He looked back at her, smiling brightly at him.

"You little…" Mal growled, but stopped as he realized it was entirely the wrong tone for anger. His eyes widened just as she kissed him again.

_Damnit…_Her lips were warm, and the fact that she kept her eyes open didn't disturb him as much as he thought it would. He felt himself falling deeper, deeper into her gaze…

"Hey Captain I was just-_RENZI DE SHANG DI!"_ Ron's shriek made Mal push River away as he turned, red faced, to see the Weasly boy gaping in disbelief. He coughs.

"… Leaving _now,_" Ron states, turning on his heel and heading out. Mal feels River's arms loop around his neck, and he blinks slightly. She would have known he was coming, right? Both he and Ron and-

"Yes… It was a trap," River purrs into his ear, and he feels his will slipping away. "But it's also a present." Mal looks to the heavens, sighs, and turns around. He can't go out now, when Ron is doubtless shrieking what he saw. He can't deny anything anymore, so…

"Merry Christmas, albatross," he murmurs against her lips, as he gives in. And River laughs. He instantly feels better, even as he tries not to, as a strange old carol is sung in his mind as his body is occupied.

_38 left to go…_

_A cute, sexy Christmas present for the fans. Look out for more to come. R&R!_


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